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On Deleting Instagram Forever
Dear Reader,
After thirteen years of using the app, and seven years of experimenting with deactivating, I finally deleted Instagram forever.
No “logging off for now” in the bio.
No “offline for a bit” in the autoresponder DM
No “find me somewhere else” in the final grid post
A final deletion, a freedom known like no other.
Behind the scenes of my business : I am working on a new website and on that website I am working on an archive of all the projects I have done in the past thirteen years. One of them being Personal Practice, which celebrated ten years last month. One thing I made sure to do was download all 900+ videos before deleting the feed. As evil as Meta is they make it surprisingly easy to download all of your material before you delete.
There are a few things that made this possible and I would like to lay them out, especially if you are experiencing Instagram addiction (sounds annoying to talk about right?)
Having an email list : This doesn’t have to be a weekly newsletter or a marketing funnel. Just a list. Could be in a spreadsheet. Could be on a napkin. A channel for you to tell the people when you have an offering.
Having a container to express yourself creatively : for me this is Are.na and Landscapes. In Are.na I can stick videos and screenshots and things I used to save in Instagram (I don’t need to be witnessed in this I just needed a container) and in Landscapes I get the witnessing. I get to sing to my people, relish in community, and be witnessed in my queerness and weirdness and magic amongst others.
Being sick and tired of being sick and tired : I was ready when I was ready. If you have been watching me over the past seven years you have seen me try everything. Literally everything. In the same way I tried everything to “drink less” instead of just not drink at all. Giving away my password, scheduling posts, only posting on certain days, the list goes on ad infinitum.
Others who came before me: Specifically Amelia Hruby and her podcast Off The Grid and Nic Antoinette. I had them both on the last season of Common Shapes and it’s worth a listen - Nic here and Amelia here.
Journaling : The days leading up to the deletion (when you click delete they make you wait THIRTY DAYS) I started to fear my decision a bit and needed to journal it out. I was still feeling hooked into the “social validation” of having 80k followers, the blue check mark, celebrity followers. I quickly remembered - I don’t give a shit about that when I think about the people that I love, follow, read, and admire. So why would I care for myself. In many ways it comes down to the gatekeeping of publishing - publishers, big podcasts, magazines - they want to see those numbers. Alas, we will have to go on without them.
Reading my own book: When I read through my final edits of my forthcoming book The Practice of Attention (March 2026), which I wrote while completely deactivated with no intention of returning, I was completely inspired to leave. I basically finished reading it out loud to my self and exclaimed, I have to delete this app forever. That’s how good the book is! It showed me a way to live that doesn’t require an app to validate my existence anymore. I wrote the book I needed. A huge win.
Being annoyed by people who said they quit but then … used it still : I kept seeing this trend (pretty sure I am top of list) of people who would announce they quit, and then keep using it. Or would say they were logged out, but then post, or just post on another social media modality. And it confused me. Or annoyed me. And maybe I felt some - you spot it you got it energy. Sometimes what we are jealous of shows us what we want, and sometimes what annoys us shows us what we are doing and want to shed. Especially seeing people publicly name : this is so addictive, I can’t use it, and then keep using it - feeding into their own addiction and other people’s - I found that interesting (again - me! top of list!)
Remembering Instagram is not a business plan : Spoken by the great Bear Hebert and many others, I must remember - it is a bulletin board that sometimes works and sometimes doesn't. My business has so many other tools in the pocket, many of which work infinitely greater and don’t fracture my attention beyond repair.
I didn’t delete Instagram because it feels cool, just like I didn’t quit drinking because it seemed like a cool fad or would be a win or something. I quit drinking because I was going to die. I quit Instagram because it was literally rotting my brain. I really need my brain for my work, for my art, for my life. I could no longer function the way I wanted to while it was in my pocket, or on my ipad, or wherever it was that I had hacked it to be to keep it out of sight.
I couldn’t run my business in a way that felt grounded and honest. My inner world had become so entangled with the scrolling and the lurking and the dopamine hits that I could hardly hear myself think. I had to get all the way out to know what was mine again.
Since deleting, I’ve felt the slow return of attention, of sensation, of time collapsing and expanding and returning in all the ways. I’ve been quilting more, writing more, walking more. I’ve been listening to full albums and books while I do the dishes and cook. I’ve noticed the way the sun moves across the dining room table in the morning and the way my brain can finally settle into a task without checking something every four minutes. I know not everyone can—or wants to—leave entirely, but I offer this as a reminder: a different pace is possible. You are allowed to live a creative life that isn’t shaped by an algorithm.
I don’t know that I am here to say I am against all social media. Perhaps Cody TV will emerge on Youtube. I love to spend two minutes on Pinterest every 5-9 days lol. It doesn’t have a single hook in me. I tried to make a LinkedIn account and I just got confused. But I know that Instagram is a drug I couldn’t regulate. I used it for thirteen years and abused it for seven and today I am free.
And if you’ve been wondering how I’ll promote my work now, the answer is: slowly, relationally, and with care. Through my newsletter, through conversations, through word-of-mouth, through real-time community. If something I make moves you, tell a friend, forward this newsletter. If you want to stay close, you know where to find me. I’m still here—just no longer there. And for the first time in a very long time, I feel like myself.
I am excited to tell you that Common Shapes is returning September 17 and I have a really fun season planned out with great guests :) You can subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts.
I’m not trying to be elusive. I’m just learning to be elsewhere. In my life. In my body. In the slow unfolding of things. I had to disappear all the way to be free. What a gift to be gone.
Thanks for being on the wild ride of the tornado person XO
Thinking about leaving but not quite ready? Hit reply or drop a comment — what’s making it hard to walk away?
Things Of Note :
Early bird registration for Mapping Your Creative Business has been extended by a day - sign up by midnight and take 20% off with code MAPPINGBIZ20 + Join me this weekend for class! (Recorded if you can’t catch it live)
My books are open for the next two weeks for 1:1 Creative Advising Sessions : especially if you want to strategize markeing without social media! (Want to do a deep dive? Email info@codycookparrott.com to schedule)
As Gaza continues to starve - The Sameer Project continues to provide resources for redistribution or places to share amongst your own networks. If you’re looking for somewhere to turn I suggest looking here.
How to be Dissident : Learning From Indigenous Resistance and Resilience with Chris La Tray on Holly Whitaker’s new podcast co-regulation
This Saturday August 9 I am so looking forward to seeing Robin Wall Kimmerer speak at the Traverse City Opera House - what a gift! In my own small town! Physical tickets are sold out but my understanding is it is available on demand virtually.
CLASSIFIEDS : The Artful Career is open! Ready to shape your career to feel aligned, alive & abundant? Claim your spot. Your creative season starts now. ✷ Support for creative leaders ✷ Project & operations help for artists & orgs. Flexible systems. Creative clarity. Designed to protect your time & vision. Joyus Studio is a queer-owned storytelling consultancy to make the impossible feel possible. Email for a free 20min consultation - cody@joyus.studio COSMOS: A mythopoetic, queer astrology retreat in Joshua Tree. Explore the stars with us this September and get weird with it!
Want to include a classified ad for August 18? Click here to read more
Are.na
Email : info@codycookparrott.com
Website : https://www.codycookparrott.com
Writing Group : Landscapes
Want to read July’s installment of Behind the Scenes of Business for paid subscribers : Check out Marketing without Instagram : Does it even work?
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