20/25 Vision: Looking Back (Thoughts & Lists)
It’s the 29th of December as I write this newsletter. Believe it or not, it’s snowing here in Buffalo. On top of that bit of normalcy, winds are hitting 70 MPH, which is creating a very charged yet quiet atmosphere. It’s nice, in a way, but also disconcerting. Very on-brand way for 2025 to draw down to a close.
On a personal level, this year was one of the most important years of my life. I’m gonna lay it out to share, and also to tell myself “Hey, all this shit happened, don’t forget any of it.”
Amanda and I took a wild swing with little resources and started an independent bookstore here in downtown Buffalo, and it seems to have take root. Evening House Books is real, a warm room of a store leading to an artisan mall populated with other small business owners, spotlighting a curated selection of small press books, books in translation, weird fiction, magical realism, manga, gifts and more. Locals and visitors alike seem to like what we’re doing, and the store has given us a wealth of friendship and great memories. I don’t think I’ve ever felt so connected to the world, and I couldn’t be happier to see Amanda so appreciated. We’re not at the point I can quit my day job, but we’re growing and here to stay.
I took indie publishing out for a spin, putting out Boxcutters, a short story collection, with Malarkey Books on my birthday in May, and then followed it up with my first published novel, Feast of the Pale Leviathan, with Deep Overstock Books (run by Powell’s friends) in September. I’ve been writing since childhood, and finally putting work out like this, on my own terms, with covers I personally designed, has been a dream come true (though it comes burdened with anxieties as well, given the mercurial and unknowable waters of publishing, but joy is the primary thing!)
Cold Signal’s third issue was released early into 2025, and I couldn’t be more proud of it. As a project, CS has been such a blessing, helping me hone my digital collage skills and introducing me to so many excellent and wonderful writers. Since then, I put out a submission call for novelettes, thinking the project would be easy enough to handle, but that was a mistake! A tremendous mistake! More updates to come, but the novelettes are coming in 2026, each with their own covers, in the manner of J.F. Gleeson’s Blood Craft.
As a way to cover expenses and for the fun of it, I opened up for freelance book cover designs. Since then, I’ve done two covers for Malarkey authors: (The Walls Are Closing In On Us by Joshua Trent Brown and The Inaccessible Rail, by Roger Vaillancourt). I have another great design almost completed for the great Dee Holloway, and another in the pipeline for a great Malarkey author. Hope to design more covers in the coming year!
Between all of this, publishing short fiction wasn’t a major priority, but I still managed to get out a few. Some were self-published on my personal site to save myself the time submitting them: The Wall-Hole (a dreamlike tale about a hole in the wall) and Every Year, A Little Faster (originally published in a Malarkey backer zine, a tale of the quantum horror of Santa Claus.)
The two stories I did publish with lit mags are dear to my heart: The Great Dark came out in early 2025 with Twin Pies Literary, a story of young love and the secret horrors hiding in homes, and was later included in Boxcutters. Then, Inclement Weather (a story about designer tiny jackets and the people who love them) came out in hex literary, and they were kind enough to nominate it for Best Small Fictions. Love you guys.
One big thing I learned this year is that I have a fucking limit, and it is a wall with minimal give, miles per hour be damned. Working multiple jobs, promoting my books, trying to edit CS and freelance gig all at once left little time for my heart and mind to rest, and I dealt with long periods of burnout where it took everything I had to keep things moving.
Moving forward, I don’t think I can do it like this again, and I wouldn’t really recommend this way to other people, but now that it’s over, I am proud and grateful for it all.
For 2026, my goals are a little simpler: Cold Signal novelette season. Evening House, keep growing. Take on a manageable workload of covers.
And if I can, maybe get some real mileage in these two book ideas I have.
I’ve been reading some really great retrospective lists by other writers talking about everything they’ve read, watched or played. I’ve never been great with keeping lists like that. To be honest, I’m a nibbler. I pick up a lot of things and take a bite, but I DNF most of what I start. If I tried to keep all that in my head, I’d explode.
So instead, I just want to shout out some things I loved, specifically Books, movies, shows, and stories I’ve read from pals.
Good Books (no order):
Uncertain Sons by Thomas Ha
Twenty Days of Turin by Giorgio De Maria
Hey You Assholes by Kyle Seibel
Black Brane by Michael Cisco
Saint of Bright Doors by Vajra Chandrasekera
Visions and Temptations by Harald Voetmann
Coffin Moon by Keith Rosson
On Earth As It Is Beneath by Ana Paula Maia
Disco Murder City by Caleb Bethea
The Adventures of China Iron by Gabriela Cabezón Cámara
Dogtangle by Max Huffman
Tell Me Yours, I’ll Tell You Mine by Kristina Ten
Bog Queen by Anna North
Last Boy on Earth by West Ambrose
America’s Most Gothic by Andrea Janes and Leanna Renee Hieber
Haunted Ecologies by Corey Farrenkopf
White Cat, Black Dog by Kelly Link
Three Stigmata of Palmer Eldritch by PKD
The West Passage by Jared Pechaček
Painted Room by Inger Christensen
Good Movies:
The Vourdalak
The Passion of Darkly Noon
Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978)
Breakfast of Champions
Showing Up
Good Shows:
Chair Company
The Rehearsal (Season Two)
Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure (Amanda’s first go-through)
Like Water for Chocolate
Severance (Season Two)
Some Good Stories I’ve Loved from Pals:
Blanquitos by Karlo Yeagar Rodriguez
Volcano People by Richard Mirabella
The Babies Who Have No Eyes by Lille E Franks
In the Dream, He is Skinless And Beautiful - Spencer Nitkey
Come Eat at O’Houlihan’s Because of What We Have by Dan Weaver
The Monument by R.L. Summerling
That’s it for this long newsletter! Thanks for reading, thanks for the support as I try and live this life and make meaning and art from it all.
Here’s to a good year for everyone but the bastards & here’s to friendship and experience and strange beauty as it flowers before us.
-John