a mismatched orchard | a Qifrey-centric fic | Completed
Rating: PG-13 (Teens)
Relationships: Qifrey & Olruggio, Qifrey + Olruggio, Qifrey & Qifrey's Atelier
Characters: Qifrey, Olruggio, Tetia, Richeh, Agott, Coco
Tags: canon-compliant, angst, angst with a happy ending
Summary:
Is it really family if you're not technically supposed to be a family?
word count: 2854
DISCLAIMER: I do not own Witch Hat Atelier, or any of the related characters. The Witch Hat Atelier series is created by Shirahama Kamome and owned by Kodansha Ltd. This story is intended for entertainment purposes only. I am not making any profit from this story. All rights of the Witch Hat Atelier series belong to Kodansha Ltd.
The thing was, Qifrey didn’t have a family.
He was never destined to have one; whatever blood relations he had were buried away with the rest of his memories, and there wasn’t a single witch in the Great Assembly who would take him as their own. And while Beldaruit took him under his wings, what they had was undoubtedly the relationship of teacher and student.
It never bothered Qifrey though. What was the lack of a family when you lacked most things? The lack of a birthday, an eye, a past, and a fair future.
Once, he dreamed of a family; tangible and real and warm and within his reach. He’d seen the way some students of adult witches hung onto them with the same admiration he thought real families would create in their midst. Perhaps, in the future, he could create his own family.
He was wrong.
“They have families of their own, waiting for their return with success. You cannot push your feelings onto them. You may care for them but you must not let that cloud your judgment,” Beldaruit told him. “Do not make that mistake. You are their teacher, and nothing else.”
“I already know that. You’ve made that clear enough.”
As he grew up, he dismissed the desire of having one; he replaced it with a desire for revenge instead. Instead of grief, he found anger and held onto it like a lifeline. He dreamt of the Brimhats who stole everything from him and took their lives with his own hands, mixing blood with ink and tears.
But as he left his adolescence, the only things that stained his hands were ink and his own blood. His hatred for the Brimhats did not completely evaporate, but he was content to let it simmer while he laid down what would become the foundations of his very own atelier.
With that, he made it his goal to be able to pass that love to the next generation of witches with the hope that with his guidance, they could build a kinder world.
Olruggio kept his promise and joined his atelier as both his best friend and Watchful Eye. It wasn’t ideal but it worked out as Qifrey could keep him close by for various reasons.
The two of them welcomed Agott into the atelier, then Richeh, next Tetia, and finally, Coco.
Qifrey had his atelier and by all means, he would cross multiple lines for them so they could be happy.
The realization came to him one night as he watched Olruggio cook something for dinner with the girls helping him out. It was a familiar scene that played out multiple times in the past, and would no doubt continue onwards in the future. Olruggio looked up from what he was doing and smiled at Qifrey, so gentle and warm that Qifrey had no choice but to give him one in return.
What a wonderful family.
The thought made Qifrey pause, but that was it. He already discarded it along with other far-fetched ideas like him leaving the atelier to hunt down the Brimhats (he could never leave the children before they completed their education) or him being in love with Olruggio (he loved Olruggio and would cross multiple lines for him, but he knew it wasn’t the same love poets sang about).
He slid into the kitchen to help his friend set the table and as they settled down for dinner, Qifrey’s heart swelled with great fondness for the people he loved.
But that was the thing, wasn’t it?
He loved his students.
“Do you think I’m a bad teacher?”
After dinner, the two adults of the atelier ushered the girls out of the kitchen despite their protests to help them clean up. They’d done a lot to help already, and it didn’t hurt to spoil them occasionally. Still, the girls took their time leaving, throwing wide-eyed looks at the two as if to say “Are you sure?” Qifrey shook his head while Olruggio put his hand on his hip and used the other to wave them off, and the four kids finally ran off, voices growing fainter as they moved away.
Olruggio looked up from washing the dishes and frowned at Qifrey. “Where’s this coming from?” He asked.
“I don’t know. Perhaps I’m doing too much” Qifrey went back to wiping the table, keeping his head lowered to avoid Olruggio’s gaze. His hands moved in a rhythmic pattern, left to right, right to left, and repeated. “I didn’t really mean for it to happen.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about, Qifrey.”
Qifrey paused then continued with his ministrations, slower this time. “Were you ever interested in being a teacher?” He asked.
“For a few weeks, but how is that important?”
“That means you were trained for a while, right?” Qifrey pushed on, looking up to lock eyes with Olruggio.
“Yes?”
“Didn’t your master tell you about how you should respect your students’ feelings?”
Finally, something seemed to click in Olruggio’s mind because he went back to washing the dishes, albeit at a slower pace. He no longer looked back at Qifrey, so Qifrey was stuck with the view of his back.
“Well, yes, she did teach me about that. Students aren’t supposed to be your family because it’s easier to manipulate kids if you convince them you are.” Olruggio said it like he was repeating the same exact words his master must’ve used on him. “I heard that some witches convinced students that they were family and because of that, it was easier to convince them to keep quiet or let them think they deserved to be abused.”
Qifrey grimaced and held the rag tighter in his hand. “I know, and I’m—”
“But you’re not that kind of witch. Besides, weren’t you and Beldaruit family?” Olruggio asked.
Qifrey almost scoffed at the question. “No, we weren’t. He made that clear to me when I was with him.”
They were quiet for a moment. Olruggio finished washing the plates and Qifrey finished cleaning up the table. After putting away the rag, Qifrey took the pile of plates and began wiping them down. It would be easier to just use magic and get it over with, but when they were first settling down in the atelier, he and Olruggio found that doing chores together was relaxing. So they forewent the magic and did it the way Unknowings would do it.
It was Olruggio who broke the silence first. “I never saw it that way, you know?” Olruggio took the first dried plate and moved them to the cabinet where they stored their plates and bowls. He placed a piece of cloth on top of the plate and did the same for the next plate. “I thought he loved you almost like a son.”
Qifrey swallowed the bitterness in his throat. “You think so?” He hated how feeble his voice sounded, but he knew Olruggio wouldn’t look down on him for that. Not when he’d been there for him during his worst and stuck with him through it all.
“Yeah. Whenever I took you out, Beldaruit always lingered by the door. I thought it looked really funny when I was a kid because I was only taking you to the Dining Hall to buy food or to the library. It’s not like I was going to spirit you away somewhere dangerous,” he said. “But then again, the Great Hall was never kind to you. And I think Beldaruit knew that.”
Qifrey could only nod as Olruggio continued with his thoughts.
“He kept you close by when he didn’t need to. He taught you beyond what was required by the former Sage of Education’s curriculum. He didn’t need to send you off for cooking lessons or buy you all those books. My master was kind but she wasn’t that kind.”
“Beldaruit was always well off,” Qifrey commented.
“And he didn’t need to share that sort of wealth for some kid. You know not a lot of witches would do that,” Olruggio countered.
“He saw me as a charity case. It wasn’t love,” Qifrey pressed down harder on the plate he was drying then breathed. “We weren’t family.”
For a moment, Olruggio was quiet. Then he continued. “Whenever you were really sick, I visited when you were sleeping. Beldaruit would never allow me to visit you awake during the first week,” he said. “And I always noticed that he looked real tired. Bags under his eyes, messy hair.”
“Like you?” Qifrey asked, taking the chance to brighten the atmosphere a bit.
Olruggio looked at him and something in his shoulders seemed to lighten. “Yeah, sort of. Maybe even worse,” he said. “He didn’t seem to get a lot of sleep during that time. One time, I even snuck in and I saw him beside your bed. He wasn’t even wiping your forehead or anything. He was just holding your hand.”
Qifrey faltered and put down the dishes and the piece of cloth he was holding. “When did that occur? I never knew,” he tried wracking his memories of a time when he found Beldaruit beside him, holding his hand, casting a silent vigil the same way he did whenever one of his students was sick. But he couldn’t find a single instance of that happening in his memories. He would often wake up alone without master Beldaruit beside him, and if he did wake up with the older man in his room, he was never holding his hand.
Still, he also recalled there was a time when he felt like his hand was far hotter than the rest of his shivering body. That night, he removed his hand from the blanket and let it cool down as he looked outside his bedroom window.
“We were eleven or twelve, I think. He cared for you a lot, Qifrey. Maybe not with his words, but he showed it a lot,” Olruggio told him. “I thought you knew.”
“I knew. Of course I knew,” Qifrey breathed. “But I couldn’t have known when he didn’t do that outright. He never listened to me when I asked if we could move away. I knew why he couldn’t, but I was miserable in the Great Hall. It doesn’t change that.”
“It doesn’t.”
“But I suppose he was the closest I had to family,” Qifrey looked at Olruggio. “Even if he wasn’t the best.”
“And you have us now. Besides, those kids love you. Don’t you realize that?” Olruggio bumped Qifrey’s shoulder with his own. “They adore you because you love them.”
Stars above, Qifrey was not ready for that. He already felt that terrible weight on his chest while Olruggio recounted his memories about Beldaruit to Qifrey. He felt tears threaten to slide down his cheek, but he blinked them away before they could. “I’m only their master. Nothing else,” he said it like he was trying to convince himself.
“You took Agott in when no one else would. I don’t think she appreciated that fact when she first arrived here, but she appreciates it now. She wants to make the Arklaum family proud of her, and whether she realizes it or not, she also wants to make you proud of what she does. I see the way she goes to you when she makes you check her spellwork.”
“Because I’m her teacher!”
“It wasn’t always like that. She never went to you at first. It took time for her to open up to you. She never showed her first attempts in the past,” Olruggio said. “But now she does. Besides, she covers you with a blanket when you accidentally sleep beside the window.”
“I thought that was you?” Qifrey recalled the times he woke up with a blanket around his shoulders when he fell asleep somewhere around the house. He’d always thought it was Olruggio since it was something he’d always do even back when they were both just children in the Great Hall.
“Not all the time. Your student beat me to the punch at times,” he said, a smile threatening to slip on his lips. “And Richeh cares for you. She always buys you snacks she thinks you’d like when we go to Kahln. She even gave you a crystal ribbon, remember?”
Qifrey can see the crystal ribbon tied around his bed post in his bedroom where it always hung since the day he got it from his dear student. “Of course. I still have it,” he said.
“She doesn’t give it away freely, and you know this. Remember that time we took her to the doctor for a check-up and another apprentice asked her if she could have one?”
Qifrey laughed and closed his eye. “How could I forget? We had to talk to that kid’s master for almost an hour after Richeh made her apprentice cry. He was even older than her so I found it especially hilarious,” he said. “A fourteen year old kid scared of an eight year old kid.”
“And she hugged you for defending her. Richeh isn’t one to give hugs often, Qifrey. She loves you. Tetia does too. She loves your magic and she goes to you first whenever she’s sick. She trusts you not to make fun of her or to leave her behind. And I’ve heard her call you dad.”
“It happens to the best of us.”
“But she’s done it more than once!”
“It was nothing but a joke.”
“She loves you. Coco does as well. You saved her from a life of pain. Everyone here loves you.” Olruggio smiled but it was strained and there was almost a desperate edge to his voice when he ended his sentence. What did he even want? What did Qifrey want?
Qifrey picked up the plate he was wiping and continued drying it. “But I’m hardly their father. I’m just… their teacher.”
Olruggio sighed with more force than necessary then took Qifrey’s shoulders to make him face him. “So what if you’re not their father? You’re the teacher who makes sure they have everything they ever need and more. You gave them all a home when no one else would,” he jabbed a finger in Qifrey’s chest. “You are raising them not only to be great witches but good people too. I would bet the rights to all my inventions to say that one day when those kids have graduated from your atelier and I ask them if they consider you family, they would all say yes because you are.”
For a second, Qifrey stared at Olruggio. Olruggio stared back. A thousand thoughts and ideas raced around Qifrey’s mind but he had no idea how to respond to his friend. He wanted to tell him he understood, that he still didn’t know what a family really was, that he wanted to know what it actually felt like, that he was confused if he had a family ever since the day he stepped foot in the Great Hall. But all Qifrey could do was nod slowly, feeling hot and stinging tears trailing down his cheek.
Olruggio’s eyes widened and he let go off Qifrey’s shoulders and moved his hands to hold onto Qifrey’s hands instead. “Too much?” His voice was soft and Qifrey felt so much like a child again, unsure of his place in the world and what the future held for him. But like those days, Olruggio was always there to anchor him.
After taking a deep breath, Qifrey nodded but looked up at Olruggio’s face to see his scrunched nose and his lips pressed into a fine line.
“I don’t think you can ever change my mind,” Qifrey squeezed Olruggio’s hands when he saw him open his mouth to protest. “But—but I know what you mean. I just never knew. And perhaps, one day I’ll agree with you. But I’m happy, Olruggio. You know that, right? I’m happy here with all of you.”
“I know. But I wish you could be happier,” Olruggio said.
At that, Qifrey could only smile. It reminded him of another conversation they had in the past when they were younger and when the world felt far more crueler to Qifrey than it ever did.
Maybe Olruggio remembered that same exact conversation because he sighed and let go of Qifrey’s hands. “But this will have to do for now. And even if you don’t see this,” Olruggio waved his hand around. “As your family, I do. And I’ll do it for the both of us until you do.”
“And what if I never do?”
“You’re still part of this family even if you don’t see it that way. Because we all know you love us,” Olruggio leaned forward and pressed his forehead against Qifrey’s, closing his eyes. “And that’s enough.”
Somewhere in a kinder universe, Qifrey would one day call them his family and Olruggio’s eyes would light up with joy while his dear students tackled him for a hug. But on that day, Qifrey pressed his forehead back but kept his eyes open, downcast to the floor. “It’s enough,” he agreed.
END.
notes: all mistakes are my own.
anyways i think beldaruit tried his best with raising qifrey but it wasn't enough, you know? and then i thought, ok what if there was that weird not-really-rule where witches who take in apprentices are taught they shouldn't really force the idea of family but then it kinda got messed up along the way so. there we have it.
and like qifrey never had a family and this guy is so messed up he needs therapy that it reflects into the way he sees the atelier and his relationship with them.
also qpr orufrey bc i said so.
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