Bitter Karella's Fresh Hot Slurry 25
It’s Midnight Pals! Enjoy!
***
Brian Keene: Submitted for the approval of the Midnight Society, I call this the tale of the rising zombies
Poe: who’s that with you?
Keene: oh this? this is just Charlie Benante
Keene: you know
Keene: from a little thing called
Keene: anthrax
Keene: charlie’s gonna draw some picture to go with my story
Poe: hi Charlie
Benante: [inarticulate thrash metal screaming]
Keene: he says hi
Keene: so there’s a zombie uprising
Benante: [inarticulate thrash metal screaming]
Keene: but what’s the one thing more powerful than the legion of the undead?
Benante: [inarticulate thrash metal screaming]
Keene: a father’s love for his son
Benante: [inarticulate thrash metal screaming]
Keene: even in a zombie wasteland, a father would do anything for his son
Benante: [inarticulate thrash metal screaming]
King: oh I can identify with this
King: you know, I would take a bullet for my child
Keene: you’d do that for owen?
King:
Stephen King: Charlie benante of anthrax!
Benante: [inarticulate thrash metal screaming]
Joe Hill: who?
King: Charlie benante!
Hill:
King: of anthrax!
Hill:
King: you know, joe
King: anthrax once sang a song about the Stand
Hill:
King: yup yup bet you didn’t know your old man was
King: “cool”
Hill:
King: you know Charlie
King: I’m a bit of a musician myself
Benante: [inarticulate thrash metal screaming]
King: you ever hear of the rock bottom remainders?
Keene: steve please stop trying to recruit my artist
Benante: [inarticulate thrash metal screaming]
Keene: [headbanging] yeah yeah yeah!
Mary SanGiovanni: brian it’s time for the model doll house expo
Keene: maryyyy
Keene: not in front of anthrax
***
Mary San Giovanni: it’s time for the model doll house expo
Brian Keene: ixnay on the odel doll house expo may
Thomas Ligotti: I want to hear more about this expo
SanGiovanni: well, they have doll houses from all over the world
Ligotti: hm
SanGiovanni: some of the latest models have as many as TWO floors
Ligotti: hm
SanGiovanni: and can accommodate mixed families of dolls, action figures, and sylvanian bunnies
Ligotti: hm
Edward Lee: haha mary’s making you go to the model doll house expo bro
Lee: you’re so whipped bro
Keene: I’m only going to the model doll house expo because I want to
Lee: [pantomiming whip] wee-kew! Wee-kew!
Keene: stop that
Lee: ooo look at brian
Lee: gonna go to the model doll house expo
Lee: see all the latest model doll house designs
Lee: maybe gonna buy a model dollhouse
Lee: to put dolls in it
Lee:
Lee: bro actually I think I’m selling myself on this
King: yeah this sounds boss
Koontz: let’s all go!
Ellen Datlow: welcome to bi-mon doll house extravaganza
Datlow: wow we got a big turn-out this time
Datlow: I see we have some questions
Edward Lee: yeah bro
Lee: do any of the dolls got nipples
Datlow:
Datlow: are there any good questions
Datlow: any other questions?
Ligotti: do any of your dolls represent the horror of confronting your own Jungian shadow made flesh
Datlow:
Datlow: actually all dolls do that
Ligotti: do any of your dolls represent the sucking void of existential ennui
Ligotti: and the
Datlow: ah well
Datlow: that’s a very good question
Clive Barker: excuse me ellen I hate to interrupt
Barker: but that is not a good question
Ligotti: I just want to know
Barker: Thomas stop wasting the good woman’s time
Barker: also do you have any of those dolls that can pee
Ellen Datlow: so we call this model the “wisteria dream”
SanGiovanni: wow neat!
Keene: hm yes
SanGiovanni: you’ve been awful quiet
SanGiovanni: you’re not just thinking about anthrax are you
Keene: no of course not
Keene: [thinking] anthrax