feb 19 2021 - body surf
feb 19 was my birthday! haha
[feb 18]
it is snowing as i edit this. what a delight! i think about compiling another love letter about my snow embodiment because my state’s infrastructure, for all its other failures, can manage a snowfall somewhat okay, while in TX… *screams* who is surprised that this google doc offers more than the state is
[jan 29]
on this day’s xtreme sport, it is ~25º F outside and xtremely windy! i dance a bit, flail more than usual against the giant slaps of air thrashing around me
i stand facing downwind and hinge at the hips. i feel the wind’s particular texture and force giving me shelf beneath my back and lean further into it. i close my eyes and slacken some of the muscles holding my torso aloft and give my weight to the void. a truly magical sensation, ~going with the flow~ , body surfing on air, ~contact improv~ lol jk
[feb 5]
i’m walking down a set of steps in the park and for some reason, think that this patch of snow isn’t that deep and ofc, my boot sinks and that leg is knee deep.
[feb 10]
the my-leg-shaped hole in the mound on that set of steps is still intact.
[feb 16]
i put on leggings, my rattiest shoes that i enjoy running in, and a t-shirt beneath my coat. I get to the post office at 4:18pm to mail a care package to a friend who just got home from the hospital from COVID-19. apparently my post office closes at 4pm. oop!
so the small box becomes a heavy box as i trudge uphill back to my apt. by the time i get back home, i feel my back straining to hold it and really, the bar for xtreme sports is exactly that high.
but i take the chance to add on a layer. wearing a t-shirt under a coat was ambitious, even for 52º F. i haven’t run since that big snowstorm, but wonder, even assume, that the track will have been shoveled. ofc, my bratty ass is wrong 😭
the sidewalk between the steps and the fence to the track is several inches of slush. i don’t believe i’ve written about snow slush in a slushee yet 🍧 the way the late afternoon light hits the track, i try to convince myself that it might actually be cleared, just very wet. why am i like this? i already told you i was wrong lolllll
so i trudge back through the slush, my socks sloshing with wet and for a few seconds they’re cold and then my feet get over it. i’m sad i don’t get to run in circles
i walk to the baseball field nearby and notice the path around it is mostly clear. i’m skeptical of potential slicks and my fears are confirmed once i finally decide to take a couple laps. big circles! bouncing between the slush! my feet re-soak each time they land in puddles, the newness of each wet becomes a fresh splash of sensation. slush! 🍧
by the time i get to the park, i’m fully game for the snow covered expanses of grass. climbing the slush-covered path to the top, i step gingerly but the slush doesn’t care. i skid. by the time i make it to the snow, i’m full on skating ⛸ the treads from these ratty shoes have long flattened into each other. each step forward slides sideways and something something physics and my perennially tight IT bands stiffen to keep me stable. bless em!
[feb 18]
during my 5 hours of zoom mtgs 💀, I stare out the window and watch the snow fall and wonder how much is sticking.
by the time I make it to the park in the evening, most of the grass is untouched, unlike past snow days this winter. it makes me ~conscious~ of the footprints i’ll leave behind, tracing where my boots fell. footprints as records, as archives. as I dance in place, I think of all the ephemera of my body dancing in the negative space above the print, all the motion that just moves on with the wind. the snow that will someday melt is rather less precious about it than i am 🙄
[feb 12]
u bet I watched the last installment of the TATBILB trilogy. some of you remember my much-enjoyed, dashed off slushee about nº2 last year and ~critiques~ aside, i shouldn’t have been surprised nº3 got me emotional lol. maybe i’ll write about the 3rd one and/or Minari and/or _____!? requests welcome lolllll
to pisces szn! to yest’s first quarter moon in gemini! to the end of this horrendous and hilarious mercury in retrograde!
to slushee sensation,
bn