Hi everyone,

This last week was a blur. I was downtown in Nashville for two days at a conference the company I work for had a presence at. Then Saturday, I was at art teacher training, and then went to a book event. By Sunday, I was toast. My nervous system had had enough. And I couldn’t really blame it.

In a weird way, last week both flew by and felt very long. I’ve been thinking again about space, and the different ways we create space. That space can be room to breathe. It can be freedom from clutter. It can be physical space. It can be outer space. It can be inner space, like having room to think without jumbled thoughts. It can be creating space for new ideas to emerge. Space for relationships and connection. Space for fun, play. Financial space.

There are a million ways to create space, but often I find myself on two ends of the Time spectrum - either I have no time and all of my time is booked solid, with back-to-back things. Or, my time is so open that it feels shapeless. Neither of these extremes feel good.

While I sometimes love a day with unstructured time when I need to recover from a week like the one I just had, I also need structure to feel freedom sometimes. With ADHD, I tend to get paralyzed by too many options. There are times when I’m hungry where, instead of actually eating, I just doom-scroll my way through Door Dash trying to figure out something that sounds appealing until I’m so hungry I’m almost panicking. (Just me?)

The same is true, at times, with unstructured time. I get to a place where I don’t want to commit to doing any one thing, lest I lose out on the opportunity to do something else. But by the time I could’ve done anything, too much time has passed and all of my choices have gone away.

I don’t think this is just a me problem. I think this is a uniquely modern problem. We have so many options on how to use and fill our time that the options themselves become a problem to solve. Sometimes it’s easier to not choose than to choose poorly.

Lately, though, I’ve found a craving for rituals. Rituals, practices, rhythms, routines. Sometimes my autistic side (more on that in a minute) craves structure and my ADHD side hates it so we end up stuck in un-choice. But rituals are one of the only ways to make time feel real. Otherwise, our perception of time is one new experience after another, never really perceiving, just…consuming.

I’ve been reading Byung-Chul Han lately, his book The Disappearance of Rituals. I had never heard of him, until a few weeks ago I saw someone on YouTube mention his books. I decided to pick up The Disappearance and started reading.

In it, there is not a case to replace rituals. Instead, there’s an explanation of how the modern world feels because of the lack of rituals. I honestly think Han’s description of the modern world without rituals is enough to make the case that perhaps they would be worth adding back in. Rituals used to give us a way to perceive time - that time passed with markers that helped us know where we were in time. Now that we no longer have rituals, let alone community rituals, we feel unmoored from time.

I’ve been thinking a lot about this, and the antidote - perhaps the antidote is just…creating a community ritual? I’m not sure it’s that easy. Yet to that end, I’m being more intentional about saying hi to my neighbors rather than just being a curmudgeon. (Well, except the neighbors with the dog that tried to eat me and they did nothing to stop him…still might be a bit of a curmudgeon.)

Some practices I’ve been adopting lately.

• Removing Apple Pay from my phone, pulling out my actual card, and paying for things. I am hoping the idea of making something harder will help make it harder to spend, which will make it easier to save for some goals.

• Similarly, not memorizing my card number. I used to have all of my card numbers memorized in the event I needed to make an online purchase. Privacy.com has helped make this more of an obstacle (and make my card more secure in the process).

• In yet another similar vein, writing down the things I have not purchased to see them add up.

• Writing, in Cody Cook-Parrott’s Landscapes group. I think the doors are closed now, but highly recommend it. You can sign up for a waitlist to know when it’s back open. Writing for 2-4 hours a week has been life-giving (and I guess I’m trying to write a book).

• My analog Casio watch, instead of my iPhone, to check the time. It’s been something of a gift to feel like I don’t have to pick up my phone to know the time.

• Journaling, meditation, and getting morning sunlight. Sometimes these are the same thing. Sometimes they are different, but trying to do all 3 daily.

PAYING ATTENTION TO

• Byung-Chul Han’s books.

• Nina’s an interesting and thoughtful content creator on YouTube and her videos led me to Han’s books.

• Tiny Warm Pals. You can stick them in the fridge and they stay cool for a while. I’m incredibly sensitive to heat, and this little buddy is a gift.

OFFERINGS

• Contemplative Practice - A virtual mini-retreat May 21st at 6:30PM Central Time / 7:30PM Eastern / 4:30PM Pacific We’ll kick off with some reading and poetry, enter silence and stillness, and then allow a brief time for journaling and reflection. You can sign up here for $5. If you need a scholarship, no questions asked, please let me know.

• In conjunction with Art and Soul Nashville, I will be teaching an art journaling class on July 11, 2026. Registration is open! A Zoom option is available. If you are interested in the Zoom option, just let me know!

• Images of God Workshop - Two spots left! If you are in Nashville, I’d love to see you on Saturday, June 6 at 10AM. This is my practicum project for my spiritual direction training. We will explore using our 5 senses and how they impact our relationship with God.