Mellow Fruitfulness
(spot the spider)
Lord Hindlip boasts of being from the top drawer. He was raised locally on an estate very close to our house. He is handsome with a healthy complexion and robust body, not to mention decorative. He boasts a rich aroma and is an excellent keeper and an excellent cooker. However, I am sorry to inform you he has disappointed. He has not met expectations. He has lived rent free on our property and contributed the bare minimum. Less than that even. The rotter has quiet quit. There will have to be words, and at the appropriate time, action taken. Cuts will have to be made.
While our aristocratic lollygagger has lounged on a proverbial chaise longue, the conscientious Ms Pearmain has been working industriously to provide for the family. Reliable, popular and of a sweet disposition, she has shared her bounty with us. She has been so fertile that much of what she has borne has ended up rotting on the ground. The rest have been taken from her, brought indoors and their tops and bottoms chopped off with a bread knife. Then they have been skinned and cut into fine slices before being sprinkled with sugar and put in a pot in the oven.
This isn't the introduction to a grisly Halloween tale, or a declaration of class war, but about the pair of apple trees growing in our garden.
It has been a good year for apples, although someone forget to tell Lord Hindlip. We have had a fine crop. There's been a lot of apples. So many apples. And we're not done yet. There's a tray and a half still to eat.
What do you do when you've eaten so many apples and you still have more apples to eat? You go to the nearest National Trust place, pay three pounds sterling (who can say what that will be worth in dollars at the time of this newsletter going out?) for a branded bag and go ham in one of their pick-your-own orchards.
Phil and I tramped over the field, our boots sinking in the the mushy corpses of rotten apples. We may be a bit late in the season, we thought. No, over yonder, more trees stood, a ribbon tied to their trunks to indicate they were ripe for picking.
We picked, plucked, pulled and filled the bag with fruit until the bag threatened to split open and the handle cut into my fingers. Phil estimated there might be ten kilos of apples in the bag. It certainly felt like it on the slippery march back to the car.
Once home the apples were arranged on the kitchen table. Forty two in total. It was an impressive haul.
It's been a good year for apples.
The leaves will fall from the trees. Diabetes-inducing pumpkin-flavoured hot beverages will be available in coffee shops throughout the land. Halloween ghosts will come and go. Autumn will roll into winter. Christmas will follow. Winter will eventually thaw. Snowdrops will appear. Daffodils will sprout. Spring will arrive and inevitably summer.
On some stifling July day, after returning from the supermarket with too much shopping, I will open the freezer and see a bag of sliced apple forced into the bottom drawer. There'll be no room for the veggie sausages. It's much too hot to put the oven on. No one has an appetite for more than a light salad. There's nothing else for it.
Apple crumble for tea?
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I'm delighted to be a guest at the Lakes comic art festival this weekend.
I'll bring books and mini comics to sign. Page 45 will be there with more of my stuff including my boxes of mini comics.
I'm doing a live drawing and interview event with Matthew Dooley and Paul Gravett on Sunday 16 October Noon - 1pm at the Old Laundry Theatre. Matthew is the author of the delightful graphic novel Flake. It's a story of duelling ice cream vans and sibling rivalry with generous scoops of wit and a sprinkling of melancholy.
I'll be there Friday through Sunday. There's signing and sketches at the festival bookshop after the talk.
Hope to see you there!
LICAF. 14th-16th October.
Sunday 16 October Noon - 1pm Old Laundry Theatre
The Comedy of Anxiety with Matthew Dooley and Andi Watson
Andi Watson is the acclaimed creator of ‘Book Tour’ and ‘Breakfast After Noon’, both bleak but brilliantly comic tales of anxiety and depression. Matthew Dooley’s debut ‘Flake’ was the first graphic novel to win the Wodehouse Bollinger Prize, and is a tale of ice cream wars in North West England. Between them, Andi and Matthew are masters of tragic banality, the Alan Bennett's of graphic literature. Join them as they draw live and explore the humour that twinkles on the fringes of the wasteland of the human soul. Presented by Paul Gravett.
Followed by a signing session in the festival bookshop
Shameless capitalism
Paris, the fairy tale romance beautifully drawn by Simon Gane and written by me is out now from Image comics The handsome hardcover features twenty new pages of art and extras from Simon. If you enjoyed the book please leave a positive review online. That really helps us.
Order from the fine folk at OK Comics and you get an exclusive bookplate signed by Simon and me. Thx to OK for the photo.
Books signed by us both can be bought directly from Simon and from me.
Sunburn is the next book from Simon and me. Due out at the end of November. Please pre-order online or from your local comic shop or indie bookstore to avoid disappointment. Simon has done gorgeous work on the colours of this book and I hope everyone who wants a copy can get their hands on one.
Order from OK Comics and you will get the book with a signed exclusive bookplate.
Order from Page 45 and you will get the book with a (different) signed exclusive bookplate.
We're very lucky to have wonderful retailers who support our (and many other authors) books so please support them if you can.
Patreon
I have a patreon which I update regularly. Tuesdays and Saturdays I post sketches and behind the scenes stuff such as Punycorn colour pages. Thursdays I post a one page comic story. And this year I am posting a review of the book I have read that week every Sunday.
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I still have books out in the world, Kerry and the Knight of the Forest & the awards nominated The Book Tour. Support my efforts through my store – digital comics – patreon or by leaving a positive review online