Weekly Dispatch Blotter Highlights: Issue #89 Office cat tripping alarm sensors
Crazy things happening around the county
Welcome to A Most Unreliable Narrator, the slice-of-life newsletter of GenXer around town, Lisa Rabey. I talk about anything and everything with a bit of swears. I’m glad you’re here.
Throbbing Cabin is in Leelanau County whose local weekly newspaper, the Leelanau Enterprise, publishes the dispatch calls to 911. Additional reporting by The Ticker.
These are the highlights.
These are all real calls.
(All spelling errors and grammatical mistakes left in place. - Ed)
Tuesday, Aug. 15
1:41pm Lost Property Leelanau Cty., Lost her purse near the post office.
4:32pm Citizen Assist Good Harbor Beach, Stuck inside the bathroom at the beach, the lock broke.
Wednesday, Aug. 16
12:38 a.m. — Glen Arbor Township — Caller is in the campground. Nearby campers are blasting music.
1:29 a.m. — Elmwood Township — Caller thinks someone may be in his house. Door was unlocked and open when caller arrived home.
3:27 p.m. — Suttons Bay Township — Subject left marina beach around noon. They haven’t returned yet. Caller is getting concerned.
8:35 p.m. — Glen Arbor Township — Lady drank a beer inside the store and then walked out.
Thursday, Aug. 17
3:20 p.m. — Leelanau Township — Wife was at a stop sign and subject ran into her bumper.
7:27 p.m. — Solon Township — Office cat tripping alarm sensors.
Friday, Aug. 18
2:49 p.m. — Kasson Township — Caller is receiving strange packages at a vacant lot that no longer has a rental unit on it.
4:08 p.m. — Bingham Township —Caller was supposed to receive three checks via Fed Ex. The law firm is stating that Fed Ex lost the package so it’s an issue caller needs to address with Fed Ex.
4:20 p.m. — Cleveland Township — Wife wandered away from home, been gone approximately three hours.
Saturday, Aug. 19
12:30 a.m. — Suttons Bay Township — Report of someone in the woods on McKeese Road.
12:31 a.m. — Suttons Bay Township — Suspicious person.
11:14 a.m. — Kasson Township — Caller left metal wallet on bumper of the truck and drove to work.
7:29 p.m. — Suttons Bay Township — Manager had a male customer complain about food and price of food, then not fully pay bill and leave.
8:15 p.m. — Suttons Bay Township — Woman acting strangely.
8:42 p.m. — Empire Township — Caller had medication in her hand, boyfriend took it out of the caller’s hand and threw it in the grass.
11:13 p.m. — Bingham Township — Caller thinks there is music coming from Grapeview Trail Road, or the winery
Sunday, Aug. 20
1:28 a.m. — Suttons Bay Township — Nephew’s mother is trying to hurt him.
6:42 a.m. — Suttons Bay Township — A mutt of some kind wandered onto caller’s property into her yard last night. Got tangled up with her dog.
1:22 p.m. — Leelanau Township — Caller’s former boyfriend is threatening to burn all her personal items.
Monday, Aug. 21
7:36 a.m. — Empire Township — Sometime overnight four large buses arrived and are parked in caller’s parking lot.
10:07 a.m. — Elmwood Township — Man that stayed there became irate over room refund policy.
12:14 p.m. — Suttons Bay Township — Assist with cat bite quarantine.
5:20 p.m. — Elmwood Township — Manager at Orchard Creek Assisted Living says a resident has been asked to leave and he is resisting.
Wednesday, Aug. 23
8:35 a.m. — Elmwood Township — Resident threw hot coffee and is refusing to go back to his room.
4:15 p.m. — Elmwood Township — Pigs are loose. Two black, medium sized.
Thursday, Aug. 24
9:07 a.m. — Elmwood Township — Current employee has been writing checks to himself and cashing them.
8:32 p.m. — Glen Arbor Township — Four subjects on Lane Road.
Friday, Aug. 25
1:40 a.m. — Suttons Bay Township — Caller thinks she heard a car crash. Was inside her house when she heard screeching and a large bang.
2:56 a.m. — Suttons Bay Township — Tribal units request assistance for disgruntled former employee.
5:33 p.m. — Bingham Township — Wife left about an hour ago but won’t say where she is.
6:11 p.m. — Suttons Bay Township — Found bag with matches, lighter and something related to marijuana.
10:49 p.m. — Bingham Township — Someone is doing doughnuts in the parking lot for about five minutes. Possibly a truck.
11:24 p.m. — Solon Township — Stumbling female.
Saturday, Aug. 26
12:05 a.m. — Leland Township — Drunk roommate harassing caller.
9:06 a.m. — Leelanau Township — Caller found what she believes is a charger for an ankle tether.
9:10 a.m. — Elmwood Township — Caller reports son running away. Caller believes he is with his girlfriend.
6:16 p.m. — Glen Arbor Township — Caller locked her keys, phone, and dog in her vehicle.
7:11 p.m. — Suttons Bay Township — Mother of caller’s children is damaging caller’s truck.
8:28 p.m. — Empire Township — Single dad with two adolescent kids. He was swearing and yelling profanities.
8:44 p.m. — Suttons Bay Township — Male showed up at caller’s residence and is trying to fight with her boyfriend.
10:24 p.m. — Elmwood Township — Three females walked into the building while private event was going on. They don’t know anyone there and it “seems like they are trying to crash the event.”
Sunday, Aug. 27
1:21 a.m. — Suttons Bay Township — Caller is receiving threatening calls and texts.
Monday, Aug. 28
2:03 p.m. — Empire Township — Caller was at the beach and there is a man wearing an orange shirt on a bicycle. Sitting in the shade in the picnic area. Caller thinks he took a photo of her and her 3-year-old daughter.
3:11 p.m. — Elmwood Township — Neighbor started swearing at caller and mother.
4:29 p.m. — Leland Township — Customer tried to use counterfeit bill to pay for gas.
5:01 p.m. — Glen Arbor Township — Mom walking with two children and grandmother. Went to the Dune Climb Beach and now unable to walk back up the hill.
9:48 p.m. — Suttons Bay Township — Caller reports loud music coming from the Suttons Bay boat launch.
lisa x
(Fuck fascists and Nazis!)
You've just finished reading A Most Unreliable Narrator: the slice of life newsletter from the GenXer about town, Lisa Rabey. You can find me on Instagram, Facebook and Bluesky if you're so inclined. I am everywhere. Copyright © 1996 - 2025 by Lisa Rabey