🍺A Most Unreliable Narrator🍷 #184 #girlbossleansin
Also this week: jury duty, my first print publication, and why Michigan is tres super cool
Welcome to A Most Unreliable Narrator, the slice-of-life newsletter of GenXer around town, Lisa Rabey. I talk about anything and everything with a bit of swears. I’m glad you’re here.
Dear Internet,
Monday, I started working on my to do list for anything and everything having to do with my business. One thing begat another and before I knew it, I had a list of over three dozen items. Mr. Lisa asked if I’m feeling overwhelmed and the answer is mostly, “No.” The reason is that I am responsible for this, and I am beholden to no one other than myself. If something doesn’t get done, it’s not too bad so sad, it can be a literal hit to my company of one. This seems like a lot of pressure but as I was telling Best Kate, it’s good pressure. This is something that is mine and I have good feelings about it. Fuck the man!
Tuesday, I had my bi-weekly date with Steph and I had her give a cursory glance at my business website (not fit for public consumption just yet) and she was so damned excited about what I want to do and what I offer. She then started rattling off more stuff I could do like package deals and other services to add to the growing list, so more notes were furiously scribbled on my to do list. I woke up early on Wednesday morning with the thought “client portal” rolling around my brain. I need to have a client portal so that they can sign contracts, get invoices, and pay me. I need to figure out how to get one integrate it with my website.
The one extravagance is I’m paying Anne Heideman to do my logo (it’s been finalized and looks FAB!) but I’m building my website myself using WordPress. I’m an old hand at using WordPress but I prefer their classic editor to their block editor which I find to be confusing and overly complicated. I don’t even know how to ask for help on my website. I thought about putting an ad on Upwork with a budget to see what I can get. I have six static pages plus the landing page. The problem would be that the person would have to be at my beck and call for updates as WordPress updates and bugs. So, right now I’m thinking a big no to this.
I’m a very minimalist person (and if you’ve gone over my existing sites, you’d see that) with one or no graphics. I’m about using CSS to stylize the text to make it pop. Most people don’t make images ADA compliant of the file is too large. You’d think that now we’re no longer in the days of 56K modems but doesn’t matter. Image downloading a multi meg photo on your phone or somewhere with poor connection is atrocious. Imagine the cache!
Anyway, so Wednesday morning went from “client portal” first thoughts to “I need a place to develop WordPress sites to test themes and plugins” while drinking my first cup of coffee. There are a couple of themes that are widely used within the WordPress community because of how flexible they are. I checked into the price of the super popular one and it’s $59/year for the basic and $99/year for the more popular option. So, let’s say I get a client who needs a website. They’ve provided the images, color palettes, and options they want. I’ll need to calculate my cost plus the cost of the theme’s per year charge. Then I can hand it off to them after or maintain it for a set monthly fee. (I would not call myself a web developer because no code is involved.) I found a site whose sole purpose is to stage WordPress sites. You can do it for free but the site lasts only for eight hours or pay for a monthly service where you can build up to eight sites and they only get deleted if you do it. The service is $10/mo so I’m signing up!
ARGH. SO MUCH TO DO.
Also on Tuesday, I met with a local insurance agent to get business insurance, so I have that now. The basic policy fits me just fine since I do not have a brick-and-mortar location. The insurance does cover me at home and if I’m at a co-working space. The price was what I was thinking it would be yearly and since there was no discount for paying yearly, I broke down the payments per month. I can handle the monthly payment whereas the yearly payment would eat into my meager savings.
I’m also on the hunt of getting ads placed in local newspapers in KY and MI as well as newsletters. I’ve contacted the two community newspapers in MI and the regional newspaper. The quotes for one of the community newspapers is fine meaning I can swing it. Their online presence isn’t that great (per their analytics) so even though it’s reasonable for one month placement, not sure I’ll follow that option. The regional newspaper called me direct after looking at my site (I do have a signature file on my email) and they said there might be a conflict of interest as the newspaper does some of the things I do?? But they are not sure so I’m waiting to find out. If it’s not a conflict of interest, I can hop on their weekly newsletter for X price. But if it is a conflict, they will sell me the option to have my own newsletter sent out to 30K people/businesses across five counties for double the weekly newsletter ad price.
I talked to Mr. Lisa about the ad situation, and he thinks these are not bright ideas because I only have one paying client and one pro bono client. He also said that people wouldn’t take me seriously unless I had testimonials on my page because for all the future clients would know is that I’m some broad with an internet connection. (Do people trust testimonials? You can buy them! I never take them seriously.) He wants me to network in person. Trust me, I get that, I’ve researched opportunities in KY and it’s either done via email or virtual networking. Holdover from COVID days? Not sure. I’ve signed up for email after email for various small business places around here and so far only one response. I set up a video meeting (of course) with a woman mentor for a womens’ org catered towards small business owners.
I trolled groups for MI but you’ve got to understand that there is MAYBE 50K people across five counties and two “cities.” I signed up for what I could which isn’t a lot.
The thing I keep driving home to Mr. Lisa is that my target market is small mom and pop business’ and freelancers who are more than likely not going to be at the networking opportunities. Maybe some medium sized business however you want to quantify those numbers. And we also need to keep in mind that in addition to roughly 50K population across five counties in MI, there is about 1M people here in Louisville and surrounding area. Two completely different markets!
(If you want to know how to not run a business, here is the story of a local tea shop in Louisville that is a fucking shit show. You can follow it here on Reddit (account not needed) by reading in from oldest date to newest here, here, here, and here. It’s a rabbit hole. You’ve been warned.)
Wednesday, I asked for volunteers to rip apart my biz website. I’m not officially launched (planning mid-May) so I’m privately giving the volunteers the address. And the site got ripped apart, which is what I wanted.
What became super clear from my volunteers is that the Classic Editor does not consider mobilization and accessibility because you have less options than with the WYSIWYG option. I’m grateful for those friends broke my site. I can’t fucking sell services if my presence looks like shit.
(Anne did a great job on my logo! Once we tweaked the placing of the logo on the background, I now have the avatar which is in place on FB and IG accounts. The avatar is also small enough to use on the business card design. (I’m using moo.com for business card creation.) Best Kate vetted the business card design and gave suggestions for corrections. I’m going to pull the buy trigger sometime this weekend after I’ve let it stew for a while. My cards are dope!)
My to do list remains crazy long but three things have pushed themselves to the top on priority: put together a business plan, find some kind of course to learn about business accounting, and get the website under control. The rest falls from there.
I mentioned somewhere that on a previous video date with Steph, she talked about telling the story of launching her own business her biz’s IG. People love a story. I’ve started posting to my biz IG and FB for that very reason so when I officially launch, there is content already posted.
Now that I have a clear to do items to tackle, I don’t feel as overwhelmed.
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This piece is getting long as par usual (when isn’t my issues long?) so here is a quick update on what else is going:
I’ve finished up my fourth week of weightlifting and cardio four times a week. After leg day last week, Mr. Lisa ran the Theragun across my glutes, lower back, and quads and oh holy Jesus, the pain! Mr. Lisa claims I look thinner even though the scale remains the same. I’m concentrating on strengthening my body than a diet. I do not track my food now but I should for protein and sugar. My hydration remains in good form.
Brain has been OK! We dropped Strattera (non-stimulant ADHD drug) because I was close to max dosage and got nothing. My psych nurse sent a referral to another cardiologist because mine is not responding to MyChart messages to see if I can get on stimulants. I need to be in peak form with my brain to do this business. (I do not have a heart problem. I’m on the heart meds to control my heart rate because it goes off when I get super stressed and it was becoming problematic because it went from happening a few times a year to a few times a month.)
I have jury duty starting May 6th. Whoopie.
We’re heading to the cabin after Mother’s Day. I’m beyond fucking excited to get the fuck outta Dodge.
I’m shit at promoting myself (which is something I need to fix) but I finally got print copies of Anodyne Magazine which is a print mag that bought my poem, “you self medicate with cookies.” I’ve been super pumped about this because it is something I did not publish.
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I’ve been collecting Funko Pops! for many, many years. With the possibility we may be moving to Throbbing Cabin, where there is very little storage, I’ve started culling down my collection of nearly 120 Pops. I’ve sold 75 on eBay over the years and I’m down to the last 30. (I’m keeping 12. Ninth Doctor! Jane Austen! John Oliver! Captain Phasma! Brienne of Tarth!). Mr. Lisa and I went to a local collectibles’ store on Saturday and they looked at my very common pile of Pops and laughed me out the door. Now they are all on eBay. I’ve got some as low as $.01. Come buy! Whatever I don’t sell by the time we head to the cabin in three weeks, I’m donating to Goodwill.
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I’m apologizing in advance that the talk of the new biz may predominate my future issues. But I’m excited! I like to share!
Wonderful Thing
Northern Michigan
I cannot believe I have not sung the virtues of Northern Michigan!
What constitutes “Northern Michigan?”
What a great question! Because if you’re not a Michigander, you think Upper Peninsula but if you are a Michigander, it’s anything north of Cadillac. The UP is the UP, a completely different beast.
First, it is massively beautiful. Yes, the winters can be long and there is a lot of snow, but the other three seasons are amazing. If you’re an outdoor person, fishing, skiing, hiking, and other outdoor activities are world class. It’s considered one of the top areas in the US to visit and live.
We have the National Cherry Festival which pulls in 500K people to the Traverse City area which is where we’re at. There is also the National Trout Festival, Mesick Mushroom Festival, and Petosky Stone Festival plus so much more you’d be busy as hell all year long. Michigan wines are top notch and located in mainly in N. Michigan (specifically where Mr. Lisa and I live!).  There is also a thriving beer scene. Plus, Michiganders are super proud of where they live. There is even a company that sells gear for a specific highway that wraps around Leelanau Couty.
I mean, I have an outline of the state tattooed on my right forearm.
(Maybe we’re a bit…weird for this obsession about our state? Who cares!)
Plus! A flight from N. Michigan to Chicago or Detroit is 30 minutes. 30 MINUTES!
(And pot is legal, we can’t forget that.)
There is a reason why it’s the tourist campaign is called Pure Michigan.
Annnnnndddd, we touch four of the five Great Lakes which also makes us super awesome.
When I was younger and up to my early 20s, I wanted to get the fuck out of the state because it was not NYC or SF or anywhere with culture or however I was defining it. The people were backwards and life was boring. What I really meant is I wanted to get out of the small town I grew up in because it does fit all that criteria, I just laid out but the rest of the state does not. I love it here or there depending on where I’m at at the moment.
If Mr. Lisa was not hell bent on retiring in Europe (and okay, I’m down with that idea, too), I’d make Michigan my forever home.
P.S. If you’re more of a Midwest fanatic, Raygun has you covered.
Your favorite kitten from the Mitten,
lisa x
(Fuck fascists and Nazis!)
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