A Most Unreliable Narrator Issue #151 bodies in motion
ONE DAY SOON, I WILL BE A CRONE
Welcome to A Most Unreliable Narrator, the slice-of-life newsletter of GenXer around town, Lisa Rabey. I talk about anything and everything with a bit of swears. I’m glad you’re here.
Dear Internet,
Ooh, cutting it close! It’s Sunday morning and I’m just now sitting down to write. Usually, I have these written, edited, and set to go by Friday.
We’ve been busy this week interviewing landscapers for my in-laws. My MIL is a trained botanist but needs help keeping up with her gardening that is beyond the scope of hiring the local urchins. Her yards (front, back, and sides) isn’t so large as it needs tender love and care.
She’s a bit resistant about the help, which I get, it’s hard to admit you’re no longer the nubile young person you were even 20 years ago. (But according to Mr Lisa, MIL has never been nubile but the comparison stands!) Even with the resistance, it is something she does want so it’s not as if we’re forcing it on her. It’s been years long discussion and seeing how tangled her veggie planting area was a few weeks back just cemented that we all agreed we needed to get those gardens in shape.
Speaking of gardening, I’m going to work on planting a pollinator garden up at the cabin this spring and summer. I have a bit of land that we’ve carved out for plants but haven’t done anything with yet. I’m also envisioning getting a hummingbird feeder and a bird bath. It’ll be a small project for me to work on and design to how I want it. Usually, we’re at the whim of Mr Lisa and MIL, which makes sense since she’s a botanist and he likes pretty things, but I want to feel like I can contribute.
We have our own landscapers up at the cabin we hired to tame back the archangel and other invasive plants that we can’t keep up with. They (Carnes Painting and Gardening if you’re in N Michigan) did such a great job they’re coming back to do maintenance for us this season which I hope we can keep on their books for each year. They are also going to paint the cabin this summer, which is also exciting!
We had the large windows in front of the cabin replaced a few years back since they were starting to pull away from the structure. The windows were the originals from when the cabin was built in 1971 so they got some good life out of them. The roof was replaced also a few years ago. We’re getting rest of the windows replaced this spring. We had the back deck replaced last year and some reno inside this past winter. We need to have the septic looked at, front and side deck replaced, the crawl space conditioned, and a gas heater installed.
And then the cabin will be ready for full time occupation or put on VRBO.
We’re still shooting for the goal to try to live year round come the winter ‘24/25 if everything falls into place.
When we bought the property over a decade ago, it was a foreclosure so we knew a lot of this stuff already needed to happen and we’ve been hunting and pecking over it but we finally saved enough money to start tackling the big projects. We found a great contractor and using the local FB groups to get recs for other goods and services. Sometimes FB is a boon.
I had a D&C done a few years ago. This is where they go in and scrape your uterus of debris and such. it’s a pretty common practice after abortions but alas, I was not pregnant rather I had a buildup of tissue from over the years.
I was promised from the surgeon that having the D&C would help with my irregular periods. I have PCOS which means there are cysts on my ovaries and some uterine lining buildup which equated to the irregular periods. The scraping of my uterus would help regulate my periods.
I waited, and waited, and waited, and nothing changed. Then BAM! Two years after the D&C, I started getting my period on the reg and it’s been regular ever since.
I track my period via the Notes app on my phone rather than using a made for app (thanks lawmakers). I am regular every 26-30 days and as May ticked on, and that time frame grew longer, I thought Finally! I am heading towards menopause! Fuck yes! and then BAM! Period started.
I am so disappointed. Taking care of my uterus and environs is expensive, stressful, and messy. The hormone surges, the cravings, the bloating, the pain. This is only the tip of the iceberg. But, in terms of PCOS, I got off easy.
The transition to crone has been a desire for a few years now. But the big hiccup, for me, is that symptoms of menopause, other than the slowing down and stoppage of the period can mimic mental illness (mood changes). So, that’s not a great indicator for me. Other symptoms are not happening such as hot flashes (I’m freezing all the time), weight gain (solved that issue with fat girl surgery), thinning hair and skin dryness (hair remains full and skin moist).
Fucking bodies. I tell you.
Oh! If you’re in the US, next weekend is Memorial Day weekend which means American workers get Monday off. Not sure how a weekend of fireworks, BBQs, and heading to the beach honors the military dead but here you go.
Any who, with the travel to N Michigan next weekend (8-10 hour drive), not going to promise if issue #152 will arrive next weekend.
Other newsletter updates and publications
chapbook: commercial breaks
Wonderful Thing
M & S Collection
This is really fucking stupid thing to be excited about it, and I get that, but about a decade ago I was in the UK visiting chums. One day, one of my chums and I went to Marks & Spencer (UK department store) and I bought a few pairs of linen pants and skirts. I was so in love with them when I got two home, I bought two more pairs.
Weight gain over the years have relegated the pants to storage. Now that I’m close to the weight I was when I bought them, I pulled them out of storage and huzzah, not only do they fit but they are getting a bit big.
Not long from now I’m going to need to retire these pants and skirts. There are no belt loops but drawstrings and even with those pulled tight, the pants are falling.
I thought it was a long shot but I checked M & S’s website and by fuck, they still carry them! The belting is different but it’s the same pant. They even have a variety of colors (except hot pink which is what I’m wearing now).
$61 USD per pair isn’t that bad considering if my current pairs are any indication of quality. And $12 for shipping to the US isn’t bad either.
It’ll more than likely be cheaper to have a tailor take in what I own now but holy cats, who would figure M & S would still carry their private brand pant over a decade later!
(It’s the little things.)
Have a good week!
lisa x
(Fuck fascists and Nazis!)
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