If you want to be a writer, you need a pet. These are the rules (that I made up, right now). I mean, sure, you could write without a pet around, but I hope to convince you that it’s far more pleasant to write with a furry companion. And when I say “pet,” I mean “dog or cat.” A turtle is not going to pack the same punch, pal-wise. A bird is not cuddle-able, I’m sorry. And if you insist your pet rat is just as special as any dog or cat, I really don’t know what to say to you. Look, I’m not going to judge. Patricia Highsmith was obsessed with snails, so I guess you can make just about anything work.

For the purposes of this newsletter, I’m going to assume you’re not the ghost of noted super-freak Patricia Highsmith and that you’re considering a dog and/or cat. Good for you! Here’s why that’s smart:

Writing is lonely business. You’ll need company, and if you have a friend over you’re not going to write. You’re going to want to talk to them. Also your friends are busy. Leave your friends alone. Coffee shops are a good alternative, but that can start to get pricey and are we really hanging out in coffee shops these days, anyway? What with COVID and all? Even if you do go to a coffee shop — a valid option, for sure — you know who’ll be there to greet you once you come home? Who will be so thrilled to see you they can’t even stand it? Your dog. (A cat might also be pleased, but they’re unlikely to lose their ever-loving minds upon your return.) This reception is the confidence booster you will inevitably require.