4 - (Dis)Organ-ized
When I think back on my accomplishments over the last few months, one in particular fills me with more joy than seems reasonable. It isn't related to Turiya, nor to fiction writing, nor indeed to any kind of writing at all. It's not even related to creativity as we normally conceive it.
Are you ready for this? I hope you're sitting down.
I organized my side of the closet.
I said it wasn't related to creativity as we normally conceive it. Those words are important — firstly in general, because my real purpose in writing this newsletter, and in any of my creative writing, is to disrupt our normal conceptions and modes of conceiving, the way that great writing does for me; and secondly in particular, because the apparently outsized heart-warmth that my organized closet continues to give me is actually a master key to how I intend to approach my work, and my life, from now on.
I need — truly, deeply, madly need — to get organized.
organ-ized
I often think about how I will explain things to my son, who is currently less than three months old and not able to comprehend explanations just yet. It's an eye-opening exercise, truly a wonder-full one, because it forces me to contemplate the essences of things, and that often goes hand-in-hand with contemplating etymology, or the origin of words. I had never really thought of the concept, the metaphor, of organ-ization. Let me try to explain it to future Lucian; this will help me to keep it simple.
"Our bodies aren't just a a bunch of mush — they're arranged into organs. We have eyes for seeing, ears for hearing, mouths for eating, stomachs for digesting, butts for pooping. Right? And as people, everything we do is an extension of ourselves; and everything we do in the physical world is an extension of our bodies. So our house and our space are extensions of our bodies. Our bodies are mostly empty space but filled with organs that let us live and move and eat and sleep and do everything we do. So our houses should also be organ-ized — they should help us do everything we need to do. If we take care of our bodies, we'll feel good and be strong and be able to do all the things we like doing. We need to do the same thing with our space."
Something like that, anyway.
Suffice it to say that right now, apart from my closet — which is a wonderful oasis of calm, with a place for everything and everything in its place — not much else in my life is organized.
A picture is worth a thousand words: so just look at this shit!
Atrocious! (And so is my phone camera, but that's besides the point.)
If my study — physical and digital — is where I'm to process what I read, digest it and turn it into intellectual and creative nourishment, then the way I'm currently handling it is liable to keep me constipated and anxious. And indeed, that is how I feel, psychically and creatively.
So my overarching goal, over the next few months, is to really get organized. I think the project breaks down into five domains:
Physically: my study, library, and work area. Also the rest of my house, because I cannot tell you how good it feels to stand in my closet now, compared to before.
Digitally : my files and documents, and especially my Obsidian vault
Creatively: my fiction practice needs a home, a digital desk, with prompts, ideas, characters, writing exercises, motivation and encouragement, protocols, etc, all accessible, close to hand, so that I can sit down and just write.
Intellectually: I need a reading plan, a protocol, a plan to read X books in Y order. The plan can change but the point is to have one.
Temporally: I need to know which hours I have during the week, and to what purpose I will employ them, so that there's no point at which I'm flailing about deciding what to do. This one is huge.
I had said an email or two ago that it's not about time so much as focused effort.
What is focus but a form of visual organization?
777 words!
△AR
P.S. Do you know you can reply and write back? At least I think and hope you can. If you do, and you have my number, text me so I can make sure I'm getting it. I would love for this to become more of a dialogue and a community thing.
P.P.P.S. Happy birthday to all readers who are my sister!