Steve Reynolds Program - Electronic Windows To Nowhere
One-Fifth of The Way There!
Howdy ho!
Twenty songs done. What a milestone! For the intro, here’s a recently rejected list. I hate online reviews— Yelp being for sure the worst. But even Goodreads has some doozies that can get my eyes rolling and/or blood pressure rising. One particularly vexing category is “This wasn’t thought what it would be in my head so I’m mad about it.” So this was my not-so-healthy way of dealing with my frustrations.
Titles For The Novel, “Everyone Knows Your Mother Is A Witch,”By Rivka Galchen, That Would Make This Goodreads User’s Gripe A Real Thing
“I found the title very clever, but it was initially misleading. I mistakingly first assumed it was a modern YA novel about taunting and bullying in school and dismissed it” - Goodreads User in a two star review
Everyone Knows Your Mother Is A Witch: A Young Adult Novel About Taunting And Bullying by Rivka Galchen
Everyone, And I Mean Everyone From Ages Thirteen To Eighteen And Who Taunts And Bullies, Knows Your Mother Is A Witch by Rivka Galchen
Harry Potter And That Mother Of Yours, Who Everyone Knows Is A Witch* by Rivka Galchen
Are You There God? It’s Me, Everyone Who Knows Your Mother Is A Witch. Call Us Collectively “Margaret” While We Taunt And Bully You About This Belief We, Margaret, Have. by Rivka Galchen
Twilight: A Weird Side Trip Installment In A Series About Vampires (I Think?) Where Everyone Knows Your Mother Is A Witch And Taunt And Bully You About It, Including Bella, A Name I Somehow Remember Is In These Books by Rivka Galchen
What If The Catcher In The Rye Were A Symbol For Your Mother? And What If Everyone Taunted And Bullied You For Knowing This Catcher Was A Witch? That Would Be Something, Right? by Rivka Galchen
Hey God? It’s Margaret Again. Sorry About The Mother Taunt. We’re Going Through A Whole Thing Right Now And Lashing Out At Others Through The Actions Of Taunting And Bullying. It’s Really Young Adult Of Us. by Rivka Galchen
*The name “Harry Potter” implicitly means book will contain taunting and bullying
Song # 20
Electronic Windows To Nowhere
by Guided by Voices
Bob Pollard does not use computers, but he’s no Luddite. He just never has used them or got into them (though he does do Zoom meetings with the rest of GBV in this interminable pandemic era). Hell, he sent out a TYPEWRITTEN press release a few years ago. He has devoted himself to the methods of his past, the ones that have worked so far. A boombox and a beat-up acoustic guitar have been ground zero for hundreds of songs from several projects.
He for sure has expressed distaste for the concept of the internet and social media in some songs, just not as many as you’d expect. Bob’s aversion to computers is not his identity. He doesn’t work it into every conversation. Of his two thousand plus songs, less than a couple dozen are semi-explicitly about the thing that we’re all on right now. And much respect for that. He usually celebrates or addresses what he knows. It’d be like me singing about brain surgery or not being totally awesome—I could, but I’d be taking wild guesses on what those worlds are like.
Still, the “you kids today” songs pop up. Examples are “Liar’s Box,” “I’ll Replace You With Machines,” and “Packing The Dead Zone.” The title “Electronic Windows To Nowhere” from Styles We Paid For may be the perfect description of a room of people looking at their phones. Whatever you’re looking at, or engaging with, is just not as a real presence as whoever or whatever you’re in the room with.
Amazingly, the lyrics to this song focus on a very specific phenomenon of social media—the influencer. Now how Bob learned of the subset of internet celebrities, I have no idea. But lines like “Product and presence of mind/And bodies for their hair” and “In vogue and not least to detail/System undeniable/Keeping you straight/Making them desirable” address the insidious commerce of fashion and style via Instagram.
Really, though, it’s the simple rock song that I enjoy. Using E A D like so many pop songs before (off the top of my head, “Proud Mary” and “Margaritaville” are both permutations of these three basic chords), this one relies on Pollard’s expert melodic phrasing to elevate it to a classic. This isn’t the novelty of old Guided by Voices – the surprise of catchiness in the lo-fi buzz and hiss. It’s a consummate production that shows a band knowing how to create a great overall product.
Maybe the gloss of this song, with no seams showing, relates to the influencer being sung about. The influencer impresses their followers with what looks to be their perfect look, their perfect fit. Pollard and Guided by Voices here impress with a perfect pop song (besides the lyrics not being too obvious.) Influencers sell toner and diet pills; Bob sells ear candy. The only difference is this music won’t be investigated by the FDA.
P.S.
This cover from my favorite California bailbondsman and his wife is a damn delight.
This week’s Song I’m Mad I Forgot To Put On The List is “Never Turn Your Back On Mother Earth” by Sparks. Good advice, Mael Brothers.