INDY RACING, DAUGHTERS, AND AN IRISH WIDOWER
In this issue of the Reader, your grateful correspondent waxes nostalgic about a childhood trip to Indianapolis, offers a story that will make you laugh even if you don’t want to, and serves up a spot of reader mail.
This week: a 5-minute read
CONNIE’S STORY WAS MINE
It’s strange and odd and glorious how something that happened nearly 60 years ago can slip back into your mind during that time of morning when you’re asleep but not really asleep and awake, yet not really awake.
For me, on a recent morning, it was 1965, and our dad had taken my brother and me, along with two of his friends, to Indianapolis for the 11th annual U.S. Nationals drag-racing championships at Indianapolis Raceway Park. This was an event so massive, more than 150,000 spectators came to witness the top names in drag racing over the course of the Labour Day weekend.
My brother and his friends were gearheads, interested in the races and times, and the hot rods and dragsters and what they had under the hood. Me, not so much. I was drawn to the drivers, to their larger-than-life personalities, to the stories they could tell if only someone would ask. That fascinated the 13-year-old me. Still does, I suppose.
The one driver I remember most vividly was Connie Kalitta. His dragster was the first to hit 200 mph in a National Hot Rod Association event. He pulled that trick the year before. When we were there, it was another driver named Don Garlits who attracted all the fan interest, but it was Connie who intrigued me. He had a story to tell and 18 years later, the actor Beau Bridges helped tell it when he played Connie in a movie called Heart Like A Wheel.
Over that weekend, we stayed in a small campground near the race site, the five of us in a tent I’m sure our mum bought from Army Surplus a few years earlier. No one was cramped for space as I’m sure that thing could sleep 12. On the five-hour drive home, I sat beside Dad in the front seat, with the boys in the back. It was a bonding experience for me, not having to compete for his time with three siblings and Dad’s all-consuming job for his time. We talked about everything and nothing. I cherish that memory of a remarkable father.
YEAH, AS IF
Here’s news you can use. Today is National Transfer Money to Your Daughter Day. I am not making this up. We have three daughters. However, none of them need the money more than we do.
LAUGH, THEN APOLOGIZE
OK, here is a truly awful story you will feel guilty about immediately after you start laughing. It comes from Harry Stemp, an old friend from Uxbridge, Ontario, who died a few months back.
The day after his wife disappeared in a kayaking accident, an Irishman named Michael Patrick O’Flynn answered his door to find a grim-faced constable standing there. “We’re sorry, Mr. O’Flynn, but we have some information about your dear wife, Maureen,” said the constable.
“Tell me! Did you find her?” O’Flynn asked.
“I have some bad news, some good news, and some really great news,” the constable replied. “Which would you like to hear first?”
Fearing the worst, O’Flynn said, “Give me the bad news first.”
“I’m sorry to tell you, sir, but early this morning, we found your poor wife’s body in the bay.”
“Lord sufferin’ Jesus and Holy Mother of God!” O’Flynn exclaimed. Swallowing hard, he asked, “What could possibly be the good news?”
The constable continued. “When we pulled up the late, lamented poor Maureen, she had 12 of the best-looking Atlantic lobsters that you have ever seen clinging to her. Haven't seen lobsters like that since the 1990s, and we feel you are entitled to a share in the catch.”
Stunned, O’Flynn demanded, “If that’s the good news, then what’s the really great news?”
“We’re gonna pull her up again tomorrow.”
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FROM THE MAILBAG
Re ‘A Face By Any Other Name,’ Sept. 22. So as a kid, Terry, you disliked your name? Yeah, I don’t feel bad for you. Dick Wood, LaSalle, Ontario
Re ‘Those … Wasps!’ Sept. 29. We’ve had almost no wasps here this summer, Terry. The real reason wasps are so aggressive at this time of year is that they’re starving. The queen stops laying eggs and abandons the hive. The food runs out and they’re desperate for sugar. That’s why you have to be careful with bottles of pop. David Cadogan, Miramichi, New Brunswick
Re ‘Peel That Herb,’ Sept. 15. Ah, finally an explanation for why I would say “herbs and spices” but also say “basil is an ‘erb.” Lauren Baxter, Jeannette’s Creek, Ontario
Terry, I've been enjoying your Sunday Reader. Congrats on getting it up and running and I hope it's going well for you. I enjoyed seeing the pic of your mother a few weeks ago and instantly recognized her, even after all these years. Amazing things, our memories. Don Sancton, Montreal, Quebec
Really enjoy your newsletter, Terry, and look forward to reading it every Sunday. Bruce Penton, Medicine Hat, Alberta
Thanks Terry! I’m enjoying my Sunday visits with you. Phyllis Kraemer, Greensville, Ontario
If you want to drop me a note (and risk me publishing it here), just reply to this email or, if you prefer send it to mysundayreader@gmail.com.
THIS WEEK’S SHAMELESS PLUG
Canada Post is continuing to offer free shipping in Canada every Tuesday for the month of October. So we’ve bundled together two of our books—Lethbridge: A Tale of Love in a Time of War and Cabbage Brain: An Englishman’s Journey to American Success—into a single package, both books for the single price of only $25 Cdn. Also, for each of the next three Tuesdays, we’ll draw a name from among those who’ve bought this fine package and that reader gets free shipping. That’s like a $22 value!
Thanks for the gratifying response so far. By the way, if you buy the bundle and your name isn’t drawn for the free shipping, it goes back into the pot for the following week, and for the week after, and for the week after that, until we’ve used up our allotment. At the end of the month, if your name still isn’t drawn, you have the option of deciding if you still want the bundle and pay the shipping. If so, yay! If not, no hard feelings.
In addition to the reviews we posted last week, here are a few more we felt were particularly kind and über persuasive:
- “I couldn’t put it down. Lethbridge will be a book I will read and re-read for years to come. I will be reading it to my grandchildren. So well-written, so well-researched. I felt transported back to a place I never knew.”
- “Cabbage Brain is a fabulous account of the power of desire and determination to forge your future. Very entertaining and informative. I loved it!”
- “I’ve just finished Lethbridge. It was a wonderful story. Honestly, I thought it would be a good read but it was so good, I only put the book down once, to make another cup of tea. Well done!”
- Dennis Horne was deftly guided in Cabbage Brain by his writing muse, Terry McConnell. I bought 10 copies, one each for my children and my grandchildren when they’re old enough to appreciate the book’s content. Read it. It’s an enormously wise book—and hard to put down.
AND FINALLY …
From the “something you read on the Internet, know it has merit, yet have no idea where it came from” department:
If you’re sitting in public and a stranger takes the seat next to you, just stare straight ahead and say, “Did you bring the money?”
