The Art of Recommending a Book - Part 1: The Self
I’ve been feeling like I’m in a bit of a reading slump, wanting to read so many things yet not actually in the mood for that particular story when I open the book. Or, enjoying a story yet not being fully transported by it. I do feel like I am coming out of it, and finally seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.
Part of my problem, however – and working through it is the solution partially helping me get out of this reading slump – is that I’ve noticed this ever-present sense of obligation and external pressure. Of seemingly everyone loving a book, and yet not feeling it -- or, conversely, loving a book that “everyone” considers trash, or at least dismissing it from being a genuinely good story.
Book recommendations are truly all well and good. There’s nothing more that I love than someone gushing about their favourite book.[1] Half of the times that is what convinces me to pick it up![2] Yet often, especially on social media, I feel this pressure; this sense of me absolutely needing to read and love this book, to be in the mood for it right away. A creeping, slithering sense that if I’m not eager and excited, then I’m in the wrong.
To be fair, a lot of this is pressure I put on myself, catering to an invisible audience that doesn’t really exist. Letting myself be too swayed, and upset when I inevitably am not as excited as whichever person on the internet recommending this book thinks I ought to be.
That is something I am working on, and working through. It has also, however, got me thinking and philosophizing.
Reading books for fun should not be an obligation. It should not be a chore, or a moral judgement. In fact, I’ve witnessed people ticking off their bingo cards to say they’re read this “diverse” book, and that one – solely for the sake of diversifying their reading lists in an honestly performative manner. Needless to say, such people likely correlate quite highly with the ones leaving Goodreads reviews that demonstrate how they utterly failed to engage with the book.
Reading for the sake of hitting a target in that particular sense isn’t helpful or constructive. I believe it was Premee Mohammed on Bluesky who likened it to people “choking on their medicine” to demonstrate how virtuous they are.
So, I am at the point of asking myself – why force myself to do a similar thing? If I’m not a horror fan, I don’t need to necessarily force myself to read a horror genre book, no matter how amazing it is!
The thing about book rec lists is that they are oftentimes exciting! Let it be stated clearly that I love them, especially when grouped around a genre or a certain theme, and especially when they highlight books that deserve more attention. I love discovering new gems, or remembering the existence of well-known classics. It is important to expand one’s repertoires beyond one’s narrow focus on a genre. To be exposed to new masterpieces and older mainstays, to the hot new books everyone is losing their minds over. My TBR gets ever-longer as my knowledge of the SFF genre especially continues to expand.
I just have to remind myself that it is not an obligation. I need to become okay with putting a really amazing-sounding and very-hyped book on my long TBR, and getting around to it when the time is right. It took me ages to read the Imperial Radch trilogy by Ann Leckie, despite wanting to read it for several years. In all honesty, it was rather fortuitous that I waited so long. I was able to appreciate and understand Ancillary Justice, Ancillary Sword, and Ancillary Mercy to a much greater extent.[3] Perhaps, past me simply wasn’t ready.
I am a mood reader. Even if I am so excited to read a certain book or watch a certain show or movie, I can very well open the cover/hit play.... and realize that I am really not vibing with it at the moment. Moreover, forcing myself to read something that may be amazing but that I’m not really feeling right now is a recipe for disaster. No better way to ruin a book for yourself than to barrel through it while highly not vibing, despite the potential of that story being the best thing ever in a different occasion.
Not to be confused with feeling listless and not in the mood for anything – until I start a book and find myself immediately riveted and invested. Running Close to the Wind by Alexandra Rowland is a recent example, where I was genuinely placing the book high on my TBR and knew a lot of people were saying how amazing it was, yet was utterly blown away by how quickly it ensnared me. Definitely the “can’t stop reading, and want to figure out what happens next” kind of feeling, along with a truly hilarious sense of humour that sucked me right in and refused to let go. Or, while not being SFF, Courtney Milan’s books always get me; even when I’m not really feeling great, or perhaps especially when I’m not feeling amazing, I just have to open the book, start the first chapter, and get swept away emotionally into a wonderful and emotional story. If you like reading historical romances, Courtney Milan is an author I highly recommend (if you haven’t already read her books).
That is who I am, and thus I need to stop feeling overly guilty about it. Which means, of course, trying a new approach. Mainly consisting of allowing myself to enjoy reading and recommending books I really do love no matter how popular or mainstream or basic it is.
Recommending more than the usual top five white SFF authors always mentioned on Reddit posts (with Robin Hobb as the token women) is important. The SFF genre right now is doing some amazing things, and we get to hear from so many awesome voices and perspective. I always try to balance having a wider scope of the genre in my recommendations than just Tolkien and Sanderson and Abercrombie, to mention BIPOC and queer stories especially. There is no “yet” or “but.”
I still find myself enjoying books that are more mainstream and white and heteronormative, however, and that’s also ok. I am allowed to genuinely love and praise the Crescent City series by Sarah J Maas, or recommend Fourth Wing by Rebecca Yarros to my friends. There isn’t anything wrong with re-reading Throne of Glass, via audiobook this time, and getting so invested and excited.[4]
I am also, for the record, listening to and enjoying The Splinter in the Sky by Kemi Ashing-Giwa, just finished reading To Rule in a Turbulent World Vol. 1,[5] convinced a friend to put The Poppy War by RF Kuang higher on their TBR list, and absolutely tripped over how good The Truth of the Aleke by Moses Ose Utomi is.
I rather feel like authors don’t necessarily love readers who go into a story because of who wrote it or what it’s about for the sake of checking boxes. As a reader who really does try to be thoughtful, it’s not a fun thing to do on my end either. Yes, this person loved this book and wants everyone to read it, and the premise or perspective really does intrigue me; it doesn’t inherently mean that I must immediately force myself to read it, if I don’t necessarily feel in the right headspace for it, and it’s not inherently a fault I should agonize over.
I also tend to forget. I do really want to read more SFF works that have been translated; A Magical Girl Retires by Park Seolyeon is at the top of that list. Yet doesn’t binging Mo Xiang Tong Xiu’s works also count (The Scum Villain’s Self-Saving System, Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation, Heaven Official’s Blessing)? Is danmei as a genre not works in translation? Does it not also offer a new and fascinating perspective grounded in a culture not my own, all the while being an amazing and compelling story on its own?
Is reading SFF novellas by marginalized writers not diversifying my reading, yet in an organic way that allows me to derive genuine enjoyment? Have I not been branching out a bit more into horror-specific books, in a dipping-toes-in sort of way, through books like A House with Good Bones by T. Kingfisher and Mike Flanagan’s oeuvre on Netflix (The Haunting of Hill House, The Haunting of Bly Manor, and Midnight Mass)? Did I not write a heartfelt review of To Shape a Dragon’s Breath by Moniquill Blackgoose for Strange Horizons — probably my longest review for them yet, given that I had so much to say?
A lot of my favourite and comfort authors are queer or BIPOC or both, and I likely gravitate to their stories because of that. Such as Megan Derr, who writes essentially queer romantasy, as well as some contemporary books. The High King’s Golden Tongue, and the rest of the Tales of the High Court series, is my favourite. The series has recently been completed, so now is the perfect time to pick up the first book!
There is so much morality and Discourse in different pockets of the internet. Many well-meaning, yet always all-or-nothing and at cross purposes. Reading for fun is just that. Choosing to go to stories of your own volition makes such a difference! See the Dracula Daily phenomenon, which is still going strong a few years in, and which has been a personal delight of mine to be able to participate in.
There is power in revelling in the books that touch you genuinely, and in coming back to highly-recommended and new and subversive books when you are ready for them.
Now I simply need to follow my own advice, I suppose.
As for recommending books to others in a way that actually does make them want to read said books right away – that’s a topic for another time. 🙂
[1] For the power of honest gushing in getting fandoms to mobilize and new readers to pick up a book, see the Bigolas Dickolas thing, which honestly was a lovely moment to be part of.
[2] Such as Alexandra Rowland screeching about how much they loved The Hands of the Emperor, which has resulted in me being a very vocal Victoria Goddard fan and recommending her books to others in turn.
[3] I’m definitely still aiming to read Provenance and Translation State soon, and I also own her new short story and novella collection Lake of Souls.
[4] There is something so charmingly debut about it, and Elizabeth Evans (who also narrates Crescent City) kills the narration, and I can’t wait for everything to happen and go down, and it’s so much fun.
[5] Very good historical danmei, and Vol 2 is already out in ebook.