Today Makes 255
Thoughts on Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days, friendship, and grief
Hi y’all.
Today is the 255th day of the year.
How do I know that? Because of a video game called Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days.
Released in 2009 for the Nintendo DS, this game occurs parallel to the video game Kingdom Hearts: Chain of Memories and leads directly to the events of Kingdom Hearts II. It tells the story of a boy named Roxas, a boy given a name and a number as he joins the mysterious group Organization XIII in order to figure out who he is and what he needs to be whole.
Organization XIII is made up of a group of beings known as Nobodies, which are body and souls of those who have lost their heart to darkness. During the time he spends in the Organization, Roxas befriends two other Nobodies: the cocky, pyromanic Axel an the quiet mysterious 14th female Organization member, Xion.
As you might have already guessed, there is a lot more to this game than it seems. It is a story of identity, duty, and the complicated experience of friendship. I didn’t play this game until 2018, but it had a deeply personal impact on me through its characters, especially Roxas and Xion. I’ve written two essays on this game, one discussing the found family dynamic of the main characters and the other discussing how the character Xion helped validate my genderqueerness.
When I learned that this year is the 15th anniversary of the game, I was reminded of the reunion between Roxas, Xion, and Axel in Kingdom Hearts III. It is a tearful one and I never understood Xion’s tears until recently.
A couple weeks ago, one of my closest internet friends did something that touched me so deeply that I cried for ten minutes. I haven’t had many friends in my 33 years of life and this act of gratitude was the kindest thing anyone has done for me. It made me feel very loved and appreciated and also sad. My therapist recently told me that the reason I get teary like this is because my body is grieving the loneliness and pain that I’ve felt for so many years.
When Xion cries in Kingdom Hearts III after reuniting with her friends, she is grieving too. She is grieving the time she lost to oblivion due to the events of Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days and the time spent having her sense of self denied by an unhealthy environment.
Appropriate to this grief is Xion’s character theme music, an achingly beautiful piano and orchestral theme. It is a motif in Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days and Kingdom Hearts III, though the latter makes her theme more triumphant once she and Roxas return. Her story and Roxas’s showed me that even if you have to endure some pain for a while, you don’t have to do it alone. You can have friends to help you manage the pain and sit with you until it ends. With things as simple as a sunset and some sea-salt ice cream, you can survive anything.
I’m going to end this with my favorite fan project inspired by Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days, the song “Hold On You” by NateWantsToBattle. It is the perfect theme song for the Sea Salt Trio’s friendship and for the friendships I value in my life.
Until next time y’all.