#3- Drive if you're lonely
I experimented with some cultural criticism this week, and aimed for around 500 words. You can let me know what you think by replying to this email.
#3- Drive if you're lonely
Lonely men on the internet love Drive, the 2011 Ryan Gosling vehicle (pardon the pun), and it’s easy to see why. It’s a gorgeous movie filled with gorgeous, talented actors, and it tells these men exactly what they want to hear.
Heads up: this article spoils most of Drive (2011).
In the movie, Ryan Gosling plays an exceptional driver. During the day he’s a stunt driver. During the night, he’s a get-away driver. And this man must be lonely. At the start of the film the only people in his life are his boss (Bryan Cranston) and some mobsters his boss is making a deal with. Then he starts exchanging glances with his neighbor, a waitress named Irene (Carey Mulligan). And he starts helping her out, giving rides, helping with chores. She has a son, Benicio, and the Driver very sweet with him.
Gosling's character's identity is wrapped up in his primary skill. When asked about himself, he leads with "I drive." He never gets a name, and in the credits he's simply listed as 'Driver.'
When Irene’s baby daddy, Standard Gabrielle (Oscar Isaac), comes home from prison it turns out he’s indebted to the mob. And they’ve threatened to hurt Irene and their son unless Standard robs a pawn shop. He obviously doesn’t want to go back to prison, he loves his kid, so he’s at a crossroads. Gosling elects to help him... as the get-away driver. Except for this heist, unlike every other heist before, goes wrong. Standard gets gunned down mid-robbery. Now a man is dead and the Driver is implicated. So Gosling spends the rest of the movie killing mobsters and driving cars, trying to get the mob off his tail. In the process, his boss is killed, Irene watches him stomp a man to death, and the Driver himself is almost killed. He loses everything he's built in Los Angeles and the movie ends with Gosling driving into the distance, presumably to start a new life.
There’s a large contingent of men on the internet who love this movie. They'll post clips from Drive, or of Ryan Gosling generally, set to a song from the movie’s soundtrack, and caption it “literally me.” This is mostly a joke, I think. But there’s something there. Now, more than ever before, men are pre-disposed to liking Drive. They’re lonely, both socially and romantically. Fewer of them are in relationships than in previous decades. And I don’t think it’s a stretch to say that men base their identities around their jobs the same way the Driver does.
If you’re a lonely man, the movie is agrees with both your most flattering and most self-destructive thoughts. It helps you live the fantasy that, if pressed, you could defend against anyone who threatened you and yours. That you are exceptional at your job. But also if you actually made an effort to become attached to other people, it would end in disaster. So you have to stay as you are- lonely and competent. If you hate yourself, but secretly think you’re the shit, this movie sooths you.
Of course that's a fantasy of control. In real life, there is always be someone stronger than you, who could hurt you no matter how hard you tried to stop them. But also, reaching out and connecting with others others won't result in you or them being destroyed.
On the other hand, maybe this movie is serving the same purpose as listening to a sad song- by agreeing with the messages they're telling themselves, it helps them feel better. I just hope that when they're done watching Drive, they go start a Ryan Gosling fan club or something. When you're feeling lonely, relating to a movie can feel good. But connecting to other people is the actual solution.