Cinema Disaster: Bullet Train Down

In this asylum special, it is fairly clear the script was originally written to refer to a plane. When it was changed to a train, they didn’t fix everything.

Parachutes.

To escape from a train.

Parachutes.

Oh, and the “bullet train” of the title is a maglev. Which doesn’t have a power train both ends.

High speed trains have an engine at both ends, and I have personal experience with what happens when one stops working: Your train ceases to be high speed.

And, on top of that, there was an Osprey moving forward with the rotors in hover mode and the CGi was just plain awful.

Despite all of this? The most unrealistic part of the entire thing is that Jack, the billionaire, cared only about getting all the passengers off safely. Ahem.

I will give them one point. The protagonist is Black and Rashod Freelove isn’t that terrible an actor. And he was the only person on the train that didn’t have me rooting for the bomb.

Yes, this is a terrible Speed ripoff. Made more terrible by the fact that these people simply don’t know how high speed trains work.

(Also, they could barely afford windows).

But it had its moments.

Andor 1.11 "Daughter of Ferrix"

This show has a bit of "The things that have always happened to Black people are happening to white people so white people get it" going on.

Maarva, Cassian's adoptive mother, is dead, and the Imperials are hoping to catch him when he shows up for her "bricking" (On Ferrix, they cremate you, bind your ashes into a brick, and put it in an appropriate wall. I kind of like that).

Andor has escaped the prison, but is now on the run again. He's captured by the residents of Narkina 5, and almost sold back to the Empire.

Things get pretty tough for everyone. Mon has to consider an arranged marriage for Leida....but the girl may not be unwilling.

Rael has to let Kreegyr get captured...or does he? And then he flees an Imperial patrol, but things are about to get tough. Real tough. As one would expect with one episode of the season left.

Daredevil 2.4 “Penny and Dime”

To get things out of the way, no, they do not torture the dog. I’m not sure I trust the fate of the dog, but it is not tortured on camera.

Just threatened. Because some people are that evil.

Funerals, lots of gun battles, and the Punisher is in jail. For now. I don’t think anyone believes a jail can hold that guy.

And now somebody far, far worse has shown up…just as Matt and Karen finally start dating.

Yeah, that’ll be our friend Elektra. Slightly predictable, but only if you know the fandom.

Sooo much violence in this one.

Daredevil 2.5 “Kinbaku”

I’m normally not a fan of the philosophy of always going no contact with all exes (which generally ties in to the idea that you can’t be friends with somebody of a gender you’re attracted to and I like having friends).

Some people, though, should 100% go no contact with their ex. Especially when your ex is A. That hot and B. That crazy.

And yes, he cheats on Karen with Elektra. After Klingon courtship, because those two, definitely Klingon courtship.

We also get a flashback to when Elektra helped Matt get revenge for his dad…which appears to be what broke them up, because she manipulated him because her name’s Elektra.

The DA is putting the squeeze on Nelson & Murdock, because she’s shooting for mayor.

We do not want this woman as mayor.

Andor 1.12 “Rix Road.”

That’s one great sendoff for mom. The riot was kind of supposed to happen.

Cassian’s mother gets a spectacular funeral involving a marching band and lots of mourners. But both the Empire and the Rebellion know he’ll show up.

The Empire wants to capture and interrogate him.

The Rebellion wants him dead because he knows too much.

Lots of shooting, Stormtroopers getting punched (always satisfying) and quite a few explosions.

It’s a good season finale, but it ends on a bit of a cliffhanger, and they didn’t come back to it for a couple of years. Makes me glad I waited to watch, just saying…