The Bagel!
Yes, I finally saw it.
Movie Review: Everything Everywhere All At Once
I finally saw it. That movie. The one that won the Academy Award, Ray Bradbury Award and Hugo Award For Dramatic Presentation (Long Form). This has never happened before.
It didn’t appeal to me when in theaters enough to turn out into COVID and I only slowly realized this is a significant movie.
So, first question: Did I like it? Yes and no. It’s beautifully made, it’s hilarious in a few places, and it made me think of a friend of mine who may be just a little obsessed with googly eyes. It wasn’t exactly my type of movie, but I couldn’t *not* enjoy it.
Especially the rocks.
I also want an everything bagel now.
What genre was this movie? I’ve talked about nonsense before, and this movie veered into nonsense. People don’t use the word as often in its literary sense, but the entire bagel thing, the rocks, the dolls, the hot dogs…all of that was nonsense in the same way Alice in Wonderland is nonsense, or anything by Edward Lear.
It also held the brilliance of being entirely dependent on its medium. This couldn’t be, or imagined as, anything but a movie. I can’t imagine a successful novelization.
What surprised me, because I’d remarkably evaded spoilers, is that the entire movie is really about a woman accepting her daughter’s sexuality.
It’s a queer story, even though the protagonist isn’t queer, even though the queer character is the antagonist. You could argue it’s just about acceptance and seeing each other as parent and child.
But I don’t think it’s an accident that the sticking point between Evelyn and Joy was queerness.
I thought this movie was about a lot of things.
I didn’t know it was about homophobia. And it uses nonsense to show us that nobody has to be afraid of us.
I appreciate that.
Episode Review: What If… 1.1 “…Captain Carter Was the First Avenger”
Really, I just needed to watch season 2, but I decided to go back. They’re short (and I would be a lot further along if I hadn’t not been able to watch TV since Friday. Oh well. Management even apologized to my plants).
Marvel has used the “What if” comics line to play with alternatives for decades, and the TV show is pretty much just that. Each episode is a different timeline. Episode 1 has Peggy receive the super serum instead of Steve. Steve ends up the first Iron Man instead, which was a fun choice.
Of course, it ends with her being transported 70 years into the future, albeit not by being frozen in ice. And Hydra summoned Cthulhu.
Enjoyable and lighthearted…kind of what I needed after the week I’ve had.
Episode Review: What If… 1.2 “…T’Challa Became a Star-Lord”
T’Challa gets mistakenly abducted from just outside Wakanda instead of Peter Quill. And not only gets the Ravagers to go straight but recruits Thanos.
I hadn’t thought of this one, but it was amusing. Especially Thanos and Nebula, both of whom have excellent voice actors.
I’ve never been a huge T’Challa fan (until the movie. Boseman made the character far more interesting) and I have to admit that I was disappointed.
…where are the raccoon and the tree?
Episode Review: What If… 1.3 “…The World Lost Its Mightiest Heroes”
An angry Hank Pym murders the Avengers…well, some of them anyway. Notably, not Cap. Unfortunately, there’s not that much to it.
It’s only a What If because it happens before the team forms, and it barely manages to be that. The other episodes are much more interesting so far, this one felt like a weak link or, perhaps, a desperate reach.
Nice Natasha writing, though.
Episode Review: What If… 1.4 “…Stephen Strange Lost His Heart Instead of His Hands”
Ugh. An entire episode based on a fridging. We don’t need that in the 2020s. Strange is perfectly capable of destroying the universe and we all know that.
But the problematic element of having his motivation to do so being to save a woman who dies directly to make him be Sorcerer Strange was too much for me.
We’ve done this dance, and it’s never been a good one. No need to revisit. And yeah, that’s all I’m going to say. Marvel, do better.
Episode Review: What If…1.5 “Zombies?!?”
Quantum zombie plague destroys Earth, but there’s some really good Spidey time in this, the Hulk going on strike and…Thanos.
Sigh.
But they do fix the quantum zombie plague, which is somehow Hank and Hope’s fault. Poor Hope. Well done, much better than the last one, but it’s really an excuse to have zombies everywhere.
Episode Review: What if…1.6 “…Killmonger Rescued Tony Stark?”
Okay, THIS is what I wanted to see out of this show. Killmonger rescues Tony, Tony lets him play with StarkTech, and we get a Wakanda versus Drone battle.
It’s a mess, because with being rescued rather than trapped in the desert, Tony never becomes Iron Man. And Killmonger, of course, has one goal: Starting a war to force Wakanda out of hiding. It all makes sense with the character and I loved “The difference between you and me is you don’t know the difference between you and me.”
I’m pretty sure there was plenty of melanin in the writers’ room.
Episode Review: What if…1.7 “…Thor was an only child”
Odin gives Loki back to his actual parents. Thor grows up without the world’s most annoying kid brother…
…and surprise surprise he grows up into an immature frat boy who only wants to party. With, you know, godlike powers and lots of friends. (including Loki). Jane Foster saves the day, because of course she does.
And nice Thor vs Carol action. It’s pretty much a draw.
Fun, but also, without Thor to protect Midgard, bad things are going to happen. Guess we need the annoying kid brother after all.
Episode Review: What If…1.8 “…Ultron won”
This turns out to be the first part of a two-parter…and of course I didn’t realize. Ultron destroys Earth (except Clint and Natasha, who somehow survive), then goes on to devastate the universe, then…
…attacks the Watcher. Which seems ridiculous, but at some point in his rampage he picked up the Infinity Gems.
Aha.
This is the threat at the end of the previous episodes, tying them together.
There’s a great Hawkeye Takes Out Something Big moment. Always gotta love those.
Episode Review: What If…1.9 “…The Watcher Broke His Oath”
Never intervene, right? Well, he can intervene in…self defense. That’s honestly a reasonable excuse and if the entire multiverse is at risk.
This episode brings together all the various miscreants from the first eight, alternate reality versions and all, assembled (pun intended) by the Watcher to stop Ultron.
I’m still shaky on the need for an arc here, but it did give us some good complex fight scenes…and some happy endings. And a little tiny bit more interference than he technically should have offered, right? Including dropping a Widow in what appears to be the actual MCU…perhaps…but it’s a What If, so who knows.
That’s a wrap for season 1, so on to season 2!