Wizards of Waverly Place 1.2 "First Kiss"

Okay, this one was funny. Don't teach teenagers a do over spell and then tell them not to use it.

Because, well, they will. In this case to get Justin to successfully kiss his girlfriend. It only takes 18 attempts.

(And ruins Max's amazing sandwich building adventures, not that I want his sandwiches. He's 12).

But yeah, it actually got some chuckles out of me, and that's surprisingly hard.

Wizards of Waverly Place 1.3 "I Almost Drowned in a Chocolate Fountain"

I don't do slime well, and apparently that includes chocolate slime? Oops.

Alex is grounded for failing Spanish, and then magically cheats, using a pocket elf.

Pocket elves get high on chocolate.

If a pocket elf bites you, you temporarily...get high on chocolate. Not good, Alex! (And a ruined date, of course).

Wizards of Waverly Place 1.4 "New Employee"

More slime.

Harper is as good a waitress as me. Trust me, there's a reason you don't want me working in your restaurant.

Skills of a bench is about right.

I think there's supposed to be a message here about not working with your friends, but it really more landed as "don't hire your friends without making sure they're competent."

Which Harper...is not.

Wizards of Waverly Place 1.5 "Disenchanted Evening"

I now have Some Enchanted Evening stuck in my head. Another very after school special episode. Rules are good actually.

Wizards apparently don't need to breathe. Or don't need to breathe much, given they did just fine on Mars. Probably wasn't supposed to notice that.

Don't charm your parents. Or rather, listen to your parents, because they're probably right. (Unless you have crappy parents, of course).

Wizards of Waverly Place 1.6 "You Can't Always Get What You Carpet"

Everyone's getting their rooms redecorated, and Alex insists on wallfur. Because of course she does.

She also raids the basement for a carpet, not realizing its her dad's flying carpet. Now she wants lessons.

This is apparently Drivers' Ed for wizards. And it goes about as well as...well...parents, not always the best people to teach kids how to drive. Or fly.

Also, Justin, stealing baseballs, really? I'm not unfond of breakfast for dinner either...