Wynonna Earp 3.5 "Jolene"

Evil baked goods. It's not a proper urban fantasy series without evil, demonic baked goods.

(As a note, evil brownies in our household involve cayenne).

But this episode has Jolene running around tempting everyone with baked goods, trying to get to Waverly.

Mommy dearest tells us Waverly's father is a guy called Julian. But obviously not a regular guy. We know this.

And Jolene is Waverly's evil twin. So if Jolene is a demon, what does that make Waverly?

According to Bobo, Waverly is a nephil. Which...just makes everything much more complicated.

Also, Waverly and Nicole have a fight over Waverly not looping Nicole in and Doc and Wynonna have a fight over Contessa. Come on, Wynonna, you don't even want to keep him that much. Right?

Cinema Disaster: The Octagon

Yes, Chuck Norris was an awful person. He also had quite the career, and in memoriam we decided to watch a typical 80s Chuck Norris movie.

This one didn't have Chuck fighting Communists, it had him fighting terrorists...who had a ninja training camp for terrorists. It seemed very Ninja 101, but whatever.

It featured Chuck at his best, a woman trying and failing to honeytrap him, a completely confusing plot (said woman had multiple contradictory motivations for wanting to do something about the ninja training camp (the Octagon in the title). Oh, and a barrel literally labelled flammable as well as "What's a ninja?" dialog. I'm a big fan of "What's a ninja?" dialog.

Not everyone was kung fu fighting, mind. Some of them were car chasing. The car chase was in there to have a car chase, as far as I could tell.

I still don't understand the plot beyond "There's a ninja training camp, destroy it." They attempted more plot. They did not succeed more plot.

Wynonna Earp 3.6 “If We Make It Through December”

This is a Christmas special put together by people who very clearly did not want to do a Christmas special. They half-ass it with Bulshar dressing as Santa and stealing kids.

Wynonna has a new boyfriend, and I don’t blame her. Because Doc has decided to become a vampire. So, you’re that afraid of winding up in Hell that you’ll sell your soul and make sure you have no escape, Doc?

For the fastest draw in the west, our friend Doc has no horse sense.

Nedley is retiring, and wants Nicole to be the new sheriff.

It still really feels like the network said “Christmas special” and the writers said “Eww.”

Wynonna Earp 3.7 “I Fall To Pieces”

Wynonna and Nicole break a mirror and pick up some terrible luck (actually, it’s not the mirror, but they don’t know that).

Michelle heads off to find Julian, whom she thinks is lost and unable to find his way back to Heaven. Who knows. Is Julian actually an angel? Who knows. Because I sure don’t.

Oh, and Wynonna is so pissed at Doc over the entire fangs thing that she bars him from the Earp home. I don’t blame her!

He’s the father of her child…and while they don’t exactly have a closed relationship…

(And there’s a bar fight, because there should be a bar fight in my urban fantasy every so often).

Wynonna Earp 3.8 “Waiting Forever For You”

Don’t ask Wynonna for dating advice. Ask Waverly. Seriously. She’s the only person in Purgatory who can actually manage a relationship.

And Doc, Doc, Doc. You are not useless without superpowers.

Also, the Garden of Eden? Really? I suppose that ties in with Waverly being a nephil (if she is one), but it’s still…drifting a little Christian for me.

Bulshar revives Constance, but she’s really messed up and lets Wynonna kill her.

And Contessa became a vampire so she’d have more time to find Doc. But now she knows he doesn’t actually love her any more.

Like I said.

Ask Waverly. Or maybe Nicole.