Leave it to those always-active bears to make any promise of more frequent ursine newsletters a true and honest reality. Since our last issue, so many bears -- both real and masked -- have wandered about our wide and wonderful world, it finally seemed like time to post a new issue. And when our intrepid and fearless Midwest IMPORTANT BEAR NEWS Corespondent, Joel Leeman (who has a stellar newsletter about the Internet that you should definitely sign up for already) sent us this VERY IMPORTANT POOL BEAR VIDEO, it was finally made clear to us here in the IMPORTANT BEAR NEWS news cave that another issue must be sent, immediately. To the bears! 

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Ambitious Koala Simply Wants to Be Loved
Bear Relaxes With An Afternoon Hot Tub Soak
Bears Assume Place of Prominence In Alaskan Kingdom
Bear Kingdom Royal Family Harassed By Masked Intruder
National Park Accidentally Serves Bear Meat
Killer Bear To Be Killed, Denied Ancestors
Florida Decides Bear Killing Fun, Popular
Brave Reporter Spies On Bears For EIGHT HOURS
Campsites Are For Bears, Bears Reveal
Area Bear Violently Assaulted In Wooded Home By Man, Dog
Local Bear Mom Keeps Pregnancy A Secrecy, Nation's Capital Goes Wild
Who Was That Masked Bear, Nation Wonders

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Yogi bear [Ursus yogi], American cartoon character, a walking, talking bear in a necktie and porkpie hat who roamed fictional Jellystone National Park. His accoutrements and personality were based on the character of Ed Norton in Jackie Gleason’s television series The Honeymooners, and his byword was “Smarter than the average bear!”

food: Everything and anything, particularly the contents of picnic baskets.

habitat: Eighty three Jellystone Parks across North America, which inexplicably remain open, despite their lack of current pop cultural cache.

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Modern America: Alone, Aloof And Hungry
Recently Bankrupt City Explores Further Bankruptcy 
Neighborhood Changes, But Tenement Remains 
Credible Adults Search In Vain For Life Syllabus 
Luxurious Librarian Is Luxurious 
Ohio Remains Terrible, Hates Comfort Ponies