IMPORTANT BEAR NEWS logo

IMPORTANT BEAR NEWS

Subscribe
Archives
October 1, 2018

IMPORTANT BEAR NEWS, VOLUME 37: [Wotjek | Nobilis Polonica Ursus]

IBNGreetings, happy autumnal season and good day, dear readers! You may have noticed that it has been more than a full quarter year since last we met here in this, the inbox of your preferred email client. Maybe you spent your summer relaxing by a leisurely infinity pool, looking out as your once-frequent problems waded away into the distant past. Perhaps you spent your summer on the go, popping here, there and everywhere as you sought that truly special something to highlight your remarkably golden tan. Or maybe you, like millions of nameless industrial cogs just like you, worked all summer. Whatever you did, the bears, as always, did more. For weeks, nay, months, dear reader, your bear news collectors have been on the verge of sharing the good bear news with you and those you care about — but never pulled the proverbial trigger. There's no valid excuse — busy weekends, crowded workdays, overdue library books, etcetera — but delayed, we were. And the bears were not happy.  But no more, dear reader. No. More. We've been watching the bears this entire time (and plotting a bunch of other professional excitement, too, mind you) and we're ready. We're waiting. We're off to the bears! (Special credit this issue to Important Bear News Correspondents Tony Romm, Kassondra Cloos and Brandon Echter, among many, many others). Additionally, it is worth noting that this collection of Important Bear News Items has recently turned the ripe old age of four, which is a surprise in itself. Thanks for tuning in all these years, dear friends. Here's to four more years of bears!
IMPORTANTHonestly, Pandas? Try Harder
But PLEASE, Pandas
Area Judge Judges Area Accurately
It Was A Simpler Time Then, Truly
FAT BEAR WEEK IS EVERY WEEK
These Bears Were Innocent, Truly
You've Got Bear
It Is Not This Bear's Fault That Your Town is Dull
Leave The Governor Alone, New Jersey, He Did The Right Thing For Bears
HE IS AT LEAST TRYING TO, NEW JERSEY
Killing Both Bears Was Just As Bad As Killing the Man, Actually
Congratulations to Area Football Dad, T. Brady
Alaska, Of Course, Understands Bears
But Truly, Alaska GETS It
Sometimes, Alaska Screws Up
Answer: Bears Care About Gas Mileage, Duh
France, Don't You DARE Screw This Up
MAIS, NON, LA FRANCE
MAIS. NON.
The City Of Charlotte Is Lucky To See Bears, Honestly
And This Family Was Actually Blessed
BUT WHAT HAPPENED TO THE BEAR???
Wyoming, What Happen?
Bears Are Soccer Moms, Too, Obviously
Muffin Mix Is A Tasty Sometimes Treat We All Can Enjoy
It's Okay, Momma Panda, We Didn't Know, Either
But Can A Bear Sleep?
Black Bears Also Have Feelings, Vermont
Christopher Robin, Part I
Christopher Robin, Part II
Bears Will Never Die
Bears Get Around, Enjoy Neighborhood Strolls, Just Like You
Say It With Us: Bears Are Friends, Not Enemies
This App Isn't Trying Hard Enough, Just Like Pandas
This Bear Gets It, Even Now
Pickle, Don't Be Rude To Your Friends
Sometimes, Police Leave Bears Be
The Polar Bear Probably Had Reasons
Bear. Hot Tub. Margarita.
Music Is Magic, Friends
This Bear Is Beautiful Just The Way He Is
Congratulations, New York
This Man Is Lucky, For Other Reasons
Bear Cam Bear Cam Bear Cam Bear Cam
'Reacting' Is The Wrong Word Here. 'Being Rude' Is More Like It
BearWotjek (Nobilis Polonica Ursus), a Syrian brown bear and Polish Armed Forces Soldier Bear and Corporal who served in the 22nd Artillery Supply Company of the Polish Second Corps during World War II. He both carried supplies and legendarily alerted his comrades of a spy during his time in the army.

food: Unlike his fellow Syrian bears, Wotjek came to enjoy both condensed milk, marmalade, honey, syrup and beer. He also was known to eat cigarettes.

habitat: After his service in the war effort, Wotjek was resettled in the Edinburgh Zoo in Scotland, where he lived until his death in December 1963 at the age of 21. 
(via Wikipedia and Business Insider)
World's Fairs! A Column I Wrote!
Away (Away, Away)
Can't Not Be Selfish And Not Promote My Podcast
The Other Best Podcast You Aren't Listening To Is About Art
Come Get Your Honey
Don't miss what's next. Subscribe to IMPORTANT BEAR NEWS:
Powered by Buttondown, the easiest way to start and grow your newsletter.