WOW. 

Just, wow.

Friends, we're sorry. It's been one busy new year here in the IMPORTANT BEAR NEWS cave, what with elections and inaugurations and school invasions and the like, and we haven't had the time or energy to that this important newsletter deserves. Some of you have even asked for our return -- and we thank you, we do -- but finally, here we are. It's not that the bears haven't been up to no good -- they haven't, or have, or whatever, don't @ we -- but we have been busy, and your primary IMPORTANT BEAR NEWS news wrangler, the author of this newsletter, has been in the process of changing jorbs. As part of that transition, it's entirely possible that we won't be distributing BEAR NEWS for another long period of time. OR, conversely, we will be distributing MORE BEAR NEWS more OFTEN. Can you stand the wait? We can't. We truly can't. And now, as always and forever: TO THE BEARS.

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Russia, Why You Gotta Crush A Bear?
Baby Polar Bear Twins? Yes, Twins.
[V. Charlie Brown Voice] I GOT A ROCK.
Can A Bear Learn?
But Seriously, Can A Bear?
More Diplomatic Than Your Average Bear
The Gawker Media Group Is Asking Important Questions
Oh, Come ON, Congress, COULD YOU HONESTLY NOT 
If You Follow @Darth On Twitter, You Already Know This To Be True
Area Bureaucrat Has Half Of The Answer Correct
Who Among Us (Bears. Bears Among Us.)
CLOWNS ARE WRONG
Ladies, Leave Your Bears At Home
Let. Bears. Learn.
The Best Bears Have The Best Things In The Best Place
This Bear Just Wanted To Let You Know About Your Flat Tire, Seriously
Slow. Your. Roll.
Charismatic Mega Fauna Remain Charismatic, Fat
The Answer Is ALWAYS "Save The Bear"
The Answer is ALWAYS SAVE THE BEAR
(But Don't Save Teddy Bears. They Are Spies)
Tar Heel Bears Don't GIVE A Shit About Your Seasons
He Probably Deserved The Injuries, TBH
Bears Can Have Nice Things In Denmark
Essentially, Maryland Is Encouraging You To Kill Pooh Bear. Think About THAT.
Prez T Jeffs Loved Him Bears Because He Was A Smart President, The End.

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Pizzly Bear (Ursus maritimus arctos), a rare ursid hybrid [part polar bear, part grizzly bear] that has occurred both in captivity and in the wild. While the species typically live in similar geographic areas and have different mating habits, they also are genetically similar enough such that multiple instances of the bear have occurred. Their bodies are smaller than polar bears, but larger than grizzlies, while their heads fall between the broader grizzly head and the leaner polar bear head. They have long necks like polar bears, but small shoulder humps like grizzlies. The soles of their feet are partially covered in hair; polar bears have hair-covered soles, which act as insulation, and grizzlies have hairless soles.

food: Not enough anecdotal evidence is available to suggest a strong dietary preference among pizzly bears, but many in captivity have some a proclivity for the food stuffs typically consumed by their polar or grizzly parents. Recall, from previous issues of this newsletter, that polar bears are typically more carnivorous than grizzly bears, who usually follow an omnivore's diet pattern.

habitat: Again, as with diet, there are not enough naturally occurring pizzly bears from which to draw a habitat conclusion. However, pizzly bears have been spotted in British Columbia, Manitoba  and parts of Alaska.

(via Wikipedia)

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Crimetown Season One Was Simply Stunning, Listen To It
Similarly, Nancy Is a Great, Queer-Centered Pod
YES, I BOUGHT A ROMPHIM. DON'T @ ME
Melville House Is The Best On Twitter, Follow Them