I have a horrible secret.

A dark secret.

A secret so shameful I wish to share with no one.

Okay, fine I’ll share it.

This disgusting-horrible-no-good-weirdo secret is:

I keep a folder filled with pictures of male authors and artists working at their desks.

I know. I'm a monster.

It started small and innocent. I was just trying to find inspiration. I'm always interested in how artists make a living from their work, how they spend their days, what they look like when they are just sitting there, staring off, figuring out how to create their work.

I spend a lot of free time sitting at my desk, drawing, writing, staring off. I thought maybe finding pictures of authors at their desk’s would give me inspiration to work more on my craft.

The problem is, it’s just male authors.

I use the folder as a tool to avoid looking at youtube or my phone (which I already keep in a different room). I'll open the folder and click around. Choosing an artist to stare at. For some semblance of inspiration.

Looking at how they are posed for the picture. How that reflects how they may actually work. What they keep on their desk. I love looking at the equipment they use. How they set it up. Should I buy all the things they have?

No, I have all I need. A computer, pens, paper and an active imagination.

Douglas Adams

This is actually the last picture I added to my collection. Yet maybe the first author I ever admired.

Douglas Adams. Writer of the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.

I loved these books. I got them from my father. A man who said little but grumps and groans, so these books felt like a connection, using someone else’s words.

These were some of the few books I read in high school that I wasn't forced to. I’d read them high out of my skull floating in space, picturing silly aliens.

I loved the absurdity, the space travel, and just the reflective insanity of bureaucratic systems. What I truly love about them is the British dry wit. There’s this kind of 1970's-1980's British comedy style that I strive to be. Monty Python, Mr. Bean, Black Adder, and Allo Allo! The

Hitchhikers guide shaped a large portion of my comedy. I’ve watched the old 80’s TV show, listened to the original radio programs, and I was so excited when the 2006 movie came out with Mos Def.

There’s a place for these books in my cold heart. But I refuse to talk about it in public with other people, because I spent too many years, drunk at parties talking to some dude who loves the books. Realizing that I did not want to talk to this guy, because that guy remembers everything about the books, and it turns out I only remember that I liked the books, and that it was in space, and this guy keeps quoting the books to me and he’s insufferable.

Haruki Murakami

I've read more about Haruki Murakami. Than I've actually read by him. I've read Norwegian Wood, which was fine. It was a kinda dreamy. But I find he can be a little to obsessive about young women in his writing.

I also read his recent book of essays “Novelist as a Vocation”. Which I really enjoyed. Because, more so than actually writing, I love reading about writing.

My first encounter with Murakami was an audio book of his. “What I talk about When I Talk about Running”. It did not make me want to run. But it did make me enjoy the idea of routine. Carving out a specific hour everyday to do the thing you want. In the book he talks about a friend of his who swims. Saying that there is only 23 hours in the day. Because one hour each day he is swimming.

There’s just something to his lore I like. Him and his wife starting a Jazz cafe after they finished school and then after work, he’d sit there and write a book. Just finding time to write and getting it done.

What I don’t like about him is what I end up not liking about most male authors. I’m forced to talk about a male author with another male that I don’t want to talk to.

This is one of the many reasons I make sure to try and read work by female authors.

None of which are in that folder. Because clearly I haven’t progressed yet. But I’m working on it.

Wendell Berry

I got into Wendell Berry because I listened to Nick Offerman’s books and he really likes Wendell Berry, so I read Jayber Crow during the pandemic and found it slow and meditative. I love farm aesthetic since I grew up in a farming town. And the fool in me thinks I can become a poet farmer.

But really, all I want to do is stare out of windows.

Of course with all authors, I’m forced to speak to men I don’t want to talk to.

Wendell Berry is a big God guy, which is one aspect about him I don’t enjoy. And a lot of the guys that like him are god guys. And no offensive to any Christians or people of faith potentially reading this, but find myself thinking that if you spend all your time devoting your life and beliefs into god, you will spend more time forgiving yourself than doing the work that is actually needed of you in this world. But I’m probably wrong.

Either way, I like that Mr. Berry is a farmer, a poet, and stares out windows.

Neil Gaiman

I’ve never read anything by Neil Gaiman. But I’ve read about him. How he has a little writers cabin in the woods, where he writes pen to paper. Kinda like Roald Dahl Who’s photo should actually be in the album but isn’t, cause every photo of Dahl in his cabin makes me kind of sad.

When Gaiman’s working on a draft, ready to type it up he brings it into this office in house. A man with two home offices. Ugh. I want two offices.

I actually looked up the picture of Gaiman because I wanted to see how he keeps his desk. Messy. A nice little lamp and an external keyboard for typing. I’m not saying I went out and bought an external keyboard because of this photo. But I did and I pretty much never use it.

This Guy I Don’t Remember

This is a photo from A Case For Pencils. A wonderful blog where Jane Mattimoe interviews different New Yorker comic artists about their process. I do not remember which Artist this is. But I really love their desk space. An empty glass of wine, painter’s tape, and the same ceramic mixing palette I use.

They use a light pad, which is something I’ve wanted to try out, but I keep convincing myself I don’t need it. Because I’m not professional enough and I’m very cheap.

I will say, the one good thing about my obsession with New Yorker comic artists is that there’s not a lot of local people I’ve had to talk to at parties about it.

Hayao Miyazaki

I’ve been a Miyazaki fan since I was a teen. Me and my friends rented Naiscaa Of The Valley of the Wind one Saturday night, because my friend kept pushing it on us.

He kept saying there might be some sweet/weird Japanese anime nudity.

There was not. Luckily.

But what there was, was a magical world and crazy good animation. This changed the game for me. Because honestly before watching that movie, I thought all anime was just an excuse for my friend to see cartoons naked.

After watching that, I rented any and all studio Ghibli films I could. I’ve become a lifelong Hayao Miyazaki even though he kind of comes across as an asshole. I watched this NHK film about him, when his son was creating Tales from Earthsea. The whole documentary is just Miyazaki smoking cigarettes, drawing, writing and complaining about his son.

It’s the greatest thing I’ve watched. And it really made me want to take up smoking again.

Elmore Leonard

The very first writer I ever really idolized. If you don’t know his books you may of seen or at least heard of the movie adaptions of his books. Get Shorty, 3:10 to Yuma, Jackie Brown, The Big Bounce and many more. He’s a Detroit crime writer and those are all words I like.

What I know about his morning routine (before he died, now I assume his morning routine is not being alive) he would wake up early, write pages by hand on yellow legal paper, then after he got a few hours in, then and only then, would he allow himself some coffee.

I will not be doing this. I have my coffee when I wake up so I can get the energy to anxiously spiral out for the day.

Mr. Leonard started out working for a greeting card company and would secretly write westerns at his desk instead of doing his job. (which not working and doing what you actually want to do is something I admire most in any person).

He ended up writing about 50 books in his lifetime. And I’ve read like 10. And whenever I just want something simple and fun to read I’ll just grab one of his books.

That’s all the guys in the folder.

I do read a fair amount of female authors so its definitely shameful of me to keep just a folder filled with male authors. I guess its really just the little kid in me seeking basic male role models. But I can idolize female authors two. And should. So after writing this I’ve added these female authors to my folder.

Tove Jansson

Author of the Moomins. If you read last month’s newsletter. Yes, I finally did finish her biography. It was great.

Kate Dicamello

Author of Because of Win Dixie. I never read or saw Because of Win Dixie. But from what I know of Kate she was told she wasn’t a great writer, pretty early on in her life and kept writing until she fired off a hit.

Kate Beaton

Author of Ducks. Obviously a killer graphic novel. Her earlier comic work in Hark a Vagrant! Is wonderful. And her short printed speech, Bodies of Art Bodies of Labour just solidifies my admiration of her because she is outspoken of the working class artist.

Carley Fortune

She wrote Meet Me by the Lake. It’s a pretty darn good romance novel, that I really enjoyed. From what I’ve looked up, she writes her books siting on her couch.

Jenny Odell

She wrote two of my most favourite non-fiction books. Saving Time and How to Do Nothing. They are killer books about looking at how we view time and I would recommend everyone read them.

Yes, I agree there are a lot of white looking individuals in this. And I’m not going to make any excuses.

Clearly I need to read more non-white authors. I looked up a picture of Angela Y. Davis writing at a desk, but it’s all just photo’s of her making speeches and stuff. Which makes sense since what I read of hers was just a series of transcribed speeches.

So will I continue to idolize those male authors? Sort of. I will idolize anyone who gets to just sit at a desk and noodle around. Occasionally staring out a window.

As for me?

I’ll be outside, delivering your mail.

This Month’s Top Secret Folder

Thanks again for reading my newsletter. I wasn’t sure about writing this one. Cause it felt weird to just upload photos of male authors. But I guess it came with some self reflection.

To reward you for your reading efforts, I reward you with more reading.

As established in last months newsletter here is my top secret folder with a little treat for you to gnaw on.

This month’s “Prize” (pretty cool how I made the letter multicoloured huh?)

Is a TV show pilot script I wrote called “Naturally” it’s about a women who wants to buy a house but can’t and instead inherits a nudest colony.

It will self destruct by next month.

So get it HERE!

Shameless Promotion Time!

You can hear me talk about Men Love Horsies in the Small Change Podcast by Doreen Nicoll.

The episode is called:

Devin Bateson is a modern Renaissance man

Which is obviously confusing because the Renaissance period was from the 15-17 centuries and I was born in 1986.

Frost Bites

You can catch me live as part of Frost Bites Festival.

Tickets aren’t on sale yet.

But here’s some: INFO

TO Sketchfest

I will be bringing a short Half hour version of Men Love Horsies to the Toronto Sketchfest.

Individual show tickets aren’t on sale yet but you can grab a show pass

Alert Residency

Justin Shaw and I have been awarded The Alert Residency to create something for this years Hamilton Fringe. We get the help of some Producers and some mentorship and what we create is going to be stupid fun.

You also can’t get tickets for that yet.

What I’m saying is: You can’t get tickets yet for anything. But I’m still making dumb stuff, so come out when you can.

Smooth Comedy is Back!

Tickets!

I’ll be out of the country for the first time in my life. (Well I’ve been to Detroit and Buffalo)

I’m going to see the ocean! For the first time ever!

So celebrate with me by going to Smooth Comedy

Thanks for reading.

- Devin