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March 20, 2023

Ten Conversations My Mom and Dad Never Had…

Bill’s new Internet-connected coffee machine is a big hit around the house.

My wife Elizabeth (EK) likes to mock my fondness/penchant/reliance/obsession with gadgets. 

With that mind, here are 10 conversations EK and I have actually had that I’m confident my mom and dad never had, nor ever would have had.

  1. EK: “Let’s go.”
    BB: “Hold on. We just pulled out of the parking garage and we don’t have a satellite signal yet.”

  2. EK: “Let’s go.”
    BB: “Hold on. We just walked outside and my watch doesn’t have a satellite signal yet.”

  3. EK: “Is it raining?
    BB: “Hold on. I’ll check radar on my phone.”

  4. EK: “How was your walk?”
    BB: “Hold on. I’ll let you know after my heart rate data uploads to the network.”

  5. EK: “Turn off the lights.”
    BB: “Hold on. I can’t find my iPad.”

    EK: “Where’s your iPad?”

    BB: “Hold on. I need to find my iPhone to ping my iPad.”

    EK: “Where’s your iPhone?”

    BB: “That’s why I bought the iWatch. To find my phone.”

  6. EK: “It’s a nice day. You should go for a bike ride.”

    BB: “Hold on. I have to charge my bike helmet.”

  7. EK: “How was your bike ride?”
    BB: “No idea. The power meter on my right pedal stopped working.”

  8. EK: “Throw that away, please.”

    BB: “I can’t. The motion sensor on the trash can lid stopped working.”

  9. EK: “It’s cold in here. Turn up the heat.”

    BB: “Hold on. The thermostat lost its connection to the router.”

  10. EK: “Want to go for a swim?”

    BB: “Hold on. I have to update the firmware on my swim goggles.”

Bottom line: There is no aspect of life that technology can’t make worse, less efficient or completely ruin. So, grab that phone, charge up your underwear and face the day!

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